I think when you can't remember what you last blogged about it means that you aren't blogging enough.
Well if you're me anyway and used to have 5 blogs a day.
Twitter takes over. I don't like it. I end up posting all my crazy links and random thoughts on Twitter or facebook and the blog gets neglected. This place is more of a stable home for my thoughts though. I've been about for 5 years and it works... twitter will die out eventually just like coca cola and mcdonalds.
Nothing lasts forever.
So today I was unbelievably happy and I've no idea why. Everything's still the same. I have no money (even less than yesterday), I still have no job, but for some reason I was so happy.
I was listening to Journey's greatest hits, and dancing slightly while completing some work for Mark.
It was wonderful.
The day slowly turned into misery though. I really struggle living at home with my family when they have certain expectations for my day and then I feel like I'm doing things for other people rather than for me.
Maybe that's weird, I don't know.
Last week I bought my wedding dress... exciting.
I was going to have it made by Dolly Couture, and while browsing for dress ideas I found a real 1950s vintage number that is so utterly beautiful it almost made me cry. Seriously I'm that lame. It was so pretty though. I need to have the sleeves trimmed and lined and stuff and I wanted a collar on it, but maybe it would ruin it putting a collar on.... I love collars though... Alternatively I might have an awesome jacket... don't know... I suppose we'll see when it comes and I speak to my seamstress AKA Mother.
I think buying that dress was the best decision I've made to date... no wait... second best decision... number one would be to marry Jon the awesome McDonald. Number 2 would be choice of dress.
I have worries that people might not like it, my Mother wasn't a huge fan... I thought she would have liked it given that it's the same age as her... they have that in common you know... but she just told me what it wasn't and I said 'Do you really think I'd wear blah blah blah' and she was like 'Well I suppose not.'
And that was how that story ended.
I've no idea what she thinks about me up and leaving the country. Or getting married... but given that 4 months ago she was telling and expecting me to just get married on a whim?
So, I just played the longest game of scrabble ever... it lasted 4 days and at the end of it all I won. I kind of feel bad winning because I know i've made someone loose, and I would much rather take the hit of losing than have someone else suffer it.
This week I've not done much...
Monday I spoke to Mary the Skills Mills on the phone for three hours.
Tuesday I went to see Harry Potter and I was so scared.
Wednesday I eh... I've no idea. No Wednesday I went to see Harry Potter.
Tuesday I spoke to Mary.
Monday I must have done nothing.
Thursday I went to cammie's house with Donna and we ate and talked and drank teas and it was wonderful. Donna has the same thing as me where we don't know when to leave... so we stayed ages, and I kind of felt bad that we had maybe outstayed our welcome. Then Donna and I got scran and we went to her house to eat it and I stayed there until midnight and came home. Crazy.
Friday I stayed in and worked and listened to Journey and played scrabble.
I got invited to a job interview next Friday for the Apple store... so I'm excited about that... I think I would enjoy that job for a couple of weeks then I would hate it just like I hate all jobs, but at least it's some kind of sign of possible income.
Things are looking up... slightly.
I got my phone bill in this week and it was 16.6 times higher than it usually is and it's usually only £15.
So expensive. So the money that I could have spent on paying for Jon and I to put our forms in for immigration I'm having to spend on my phone bill.
I changed my contract today, so that's the last big bill. I should have changes it months ago.
Beyond all of that I have exactly 14 days left of being 25.
And I think, I want lottery tickets for my birthday. If I win I'll split the winnings 50% with the buyer of the ticket... it's only fair.
Anyway.
Zero and I are in a pack now.. we run in a pack together because we spend so much time with each other during the day.
I also decided today that cats are awesome because they have furry faces. Almost like masks that aren't masks. And their fur knows how to grow to different lengths to make them look pretty.
Oh Cats are wonderful.
here's hoping my future husband can be made unallergic.
Showing posts with label life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label life. Show all posts
Friday, 21 August 2009
Thursday, 12 March 2009
Red Vines.
Back in Novemeber I decided that I was going to buy Red Vines for one Blair McGarvey (sister missionary). That bag of red vines was consumed by me while I sipped on some Dr Pepper (or Feffer as Jon calls it) and wrote my novel.
Now, I am still chewing on them and now i'm eating them for breakfast, which sucks because I can feel the acid rising. Sugar, carbonation and tomatoes all cause acid to be over produced. You would think, given I ran out of pills, that I would stop being so frivolous with my eating habits. Alas. No. I seem to hate my own body.
After my 'even steven' work out I have a really sore butt muscle today... well two... one on each cheek... but I think I pulled them while doing butterfly. It just encourages me to do more.
Anyway, on my way back to the flat yesterday, after 90 minutes of intense swimming, i stopped to get Bleary's album from slowtrain records. And I love it.
Bleary are my utah local band obsession. I just think there's so much musical talent it's insane. I honestly wish I could give them the recognition they deserve. There's so much pish music in the world just now that it's totally refreshing to hear something so tremendous, with so much thought behind it. Seriously, for a three piece, they make a good sound.
Last night Dane and Amycame up from American Fork and we played Seinfeld scene it – which Jon has wanted to buy and play for weeks, but had previously exercised restraint over buying it. We broke yesterday and went on a target trail to find it. I'm not the competitive type so I really don't mind losing board games and what not, i've been losing so much my entire life at things that it doesn't bother me any more. Sincerly.
Although, we went bowling on Tuesday night with a couple of Jon's work people, and one of their significant others. At the beginning the other girl and I declared our profuse suckiness at bowling. The other girl turned out to be really good, and I was the one sitting with a 50s score while everyone else – honestly – had triple figures. Alas. I actually don't like bowling all that much 1. because I suck at it, but I get that practice makes perfect. 2. I hate that everyone watches me, I don't like that amount of attention. The only thing worse than bowling attention would be to have your birthday at the bowling alley and have someone bring out a cake at the same time as you take a shot then everyone in the entire place would just stare.
Birthday attention terrifies me. I don't like it all being about me. That's why Mary the skills Mills and I started combining out Birthdays into an international holiday called Mary Vikkimas, it technically lasts 2 weeks.
I can't believe that I'm leaving Utah in a couple of days. This is officially the longest I've ever been away from my cat, and my family. It was my November stint, but this is now winning by 6/7 days more. It's been ten weeks and two days since I was home. Kind of crazy. I can tell you, it gets tiring living out of a suitcase. I'm looking forward to the next two months so I can just kick back and live out of drawers. I'm not looking forward to having to find any kind of job, and I'm not looking forward to missing Jon. The 28 days I was without him in december was so hard and so miserable, I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do it without dying at least 5 times. I'll just have to bury myself in books, violins, cats, work, extra-curricular work, life planning, and friends.
Speaking of friends I will have just over two weeks to see Anoinette before she leaves scotland for good. FOR GOOD. So sad. marriage changes everything, and she will still be my awesome best friend, but we'll be so far apart and she'll be making new friends, and creating a new life (her own, not spawn, but she could be creating spawn... toni spawn called Kilsyth). I'm so excited for her though, and May will be fantastic, to see her and finally meet HER Jonathan. M M M mega. One day we will be old together and senile and we will both be assumed to be nutters because we both talk of Jonathans, and she will administer our medication for us, because she can and she's trained to :)
I just put another red vine in my mouth.
I went to an institute class a couple of weeks ago and the guy made a point of asking what we thought the fruit on the tree of life tasted like. Most people guessed sweet. (the choices were sweet or sour.) his conclusion was that sweet things have a bitter after taste and bitter things a sweet after taste. Therefore, he concluded the good fruit is bitter like a lemon. I can't remember if I blogged about that or not. But meh, i'm saying it again.
Man, I seriously love love love love love bleary. Such a good sound.
If you don't wake up, if you don't go to sleep, then you don't wake up, if you don't go to sleep.
So, this time last year, I was miserable. I had a job, that made me happy. Well I still have the same job, just no work. I was chasing after someone that never wanted me. And I was organising stuff for the YSA institute graduation. I was a hot chocolate drinking, roll and chips eating, cinema goer. It's funny how everything can change in one night, and everything else is forgotten.
Not so much the 'favourite past-times' like cinema, hot chocoalate, and friends. I'm thinking more along the lines of F****baws. Seriously. 12 months. Twelve months. I stressed myself out beyond all reason worrying and thinking and scheming and planning. Then one day, happiness just falls on my lap and everything that strained my brain for 12 months prior just vanished. Not surpressed. Just gone. Because. It. Never. Existed. This is what i've realised. And I apologise to everyone I moaned and talked to about it, because it was all a farcical over analysis of something that didn't really mean anything. However, if I had not been so caught up in it all I would never have been here last May, and I would never have ended up with a car in September, and I would never have stayed long enough in Utah to meet my happiness. Sincerly. If I didn't have that burgundy car I would have left Utah at the end of October right before hallowe'en. Thursday the 23rd actually. I would have been gone. But I stayed for another three weeks. Then I met him 4 days before i was meant to leave again, but I extended one last time, just in case, and the in case was just.
Sometimes it's hard to let go of past things that were detrimental to ones mental health – but without those things I would not be where I am now. And so it's hard to appreciate the pain for the stepping stone it became, when all you want to do is forget that it ever existed or ever hurt. If that makes sense. I suppose that's one of the things life is about – using the pain of the past to construct a more balanced, happier future.
That's what we need to do though. Use our failures of the past to see that they led to the successes of the present and hopefully the future.
Now, I am still chewing on them and now i'm eating them for breakfast, which sucks because I can feel the acid rising. Sugar, carbonation and tomatoes all cause acid to be over produced. You would think, given I ran out of pills, that I would stop being so frivolous with my eating habits. Alas. No. I seem to hate my own body.
After my 'even steven' work out I have a really sore butt muscle today... well two... one on each cheek... but I think I pulled them while doing butterfly. It just encourages me to do more.
Anyway, on my way back to the flat yesterday, after 90 minutes of intense swimming, i stopped to get Bleary's album from slowtrain records. And I love it.
Bleary are my utah local band obsession. I just think there's so much musical talent it's insane. I honestly wish I could give them the recognition they deserve. There's so much pish music in the world just now that it's totally refreshing to hear something so tremendous, with so much thought behind it. Seriously, for a three piece, they make a good sound.
Last night Dane and Amycame up from American Fork and we played Seinfeld scene it – which Jon has wanted to buy and play for weeks, but had previously exercised restraint over buying it. We broke yesterday and went on a target trail to find it. I'm not the competitive type so I really don't mind losing board games and what not, i've been losing so much my entire life at things that it doesn't bother me any more. Sincerly.
Although, we went bowling on Tuesday night with a couple of Jon's work people, and one of their significant others. At the beginning the other girl and I declared our profuse suckiness at bowling. The other girl turned out to be really good, and I was the one sitting with a 50s score while everyone else – honestly – had triple figures. Alas. I actually don't like bowling all that much 1. because I suck at it, but I get that practice makes perfect. 2. I hate that everyone watches me, I don't like that amount of attention. The only thing worse than bowling attention would be to have your birthday at the bowling alley and have someone bring out a cake at the same time as you take a shot then everyone in the entire place would just stare.
Birthday attention terrifies me. I don't like it all being about me. That's why Mary the skills Mills and I started combining out Birthdays into an international holiday called Mary Vikkimas, it technically lasts 2 weeks.
I can't believe that I'm leaving Utah in a couple of days. This is officially the longest I've ever been away from my cat, and my family. It was my November stint, but this is now winning by 6/7 days more. It's been ten weeks and two days since I was home. Kind of crazy. I can tell you, it gets tiring living out of a suitcase. I'm looking forward to the next two months so I can just kick back and live out of drawers. I'm not looking forward to having to find any kind of job, and I'm not looking forward to missing Jon. The 28 days I was without him in december was so hard and so miserable, I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do it without dying at least 5 times. I'll just have to bury myself in books, violins, cats, work, extra-curricular work, life planning, and friends.
Speaking of friends I will have just over two weeks to see Anoinette before she leaves scotland for good. FOR GOOD. So sad. marriage changes everything, and she will still be my awesome best friend, but we'll be so far apart and she'll be making new friends, and creating a new life (her own, not spawn, but she could be creating spawn... toni spawn called Kilsyth). I'm so excited for her though, and May will be fantastic, to see her and finally meet HER Jonathan. M M M mega. One day we will be old together and senile and we will both be assumed to be nutters because we both talk of Jonathans, and she will administer our medication for us, because she can and she's trained to :)
I just put another red vine in my mouth.
I went to an institute class a couple of weeks ago and the guy made a point of asking what we thought the fruit on the tree of life tasted like. Most people guessed sweet. (the choices were sweet or sour.) his conclusion was that sweet things have a bitter after taste and bitter things a sweet after taste. Therefore, he concluded the good fruit is bitter like a lemon. I can't remember if I blogged about that or not. But meh, i'm saying it again.
Man, I seriously love love love love love bleary. Such a good sound.
If you don't wake up, if you don't go to sleep, then you don't wake up, if you don't go to sleep.
So, this time last year, I was miserable. I had a job, that made me happy. Well I still have the same job, just no work. I was chasing after someone that never wanted me. And I was organising stuff for the YSA institute graduation. I was a hot chocolate drinking, roll and chips eating, cinema goer. It's funny how everything can change in one night, and everything else is forgotten.
Not so much the 'favourite past-times' like cinema, hot chocoalate, and friends. I'm thinking more along the lines of F****baws. Seriously. 12 months. Twelve months. I stressed myself out beyond all reason worrying and thinking and scheming and planning. Then one day, happiness just falls on my lap and everything that strained my brain for 12 months prior just vanished. Not surpressed. Just gone. Because. It. Never. Existed. This is what i've realised. And I apologise to everyone I moaned and talked to about it, because it was all a farcical over analysis of something that didn't really mean anything. However, if I had not been so caught up in it all I would never have been here last May, and I would never have ended up with a car in September, and I would never have stayed long enough in Utah to meet my happiness. Sincerly. If I didn't have that burgundy car I would have left Utah at the end of October right before hallowe'en. Thursday the 23rd actually. I would have been gone. But I stayed for another three weeks. Then I met him 4 days before i was meant to leave again, but I extended one last time, just in case, and the in case was just.
Sometimes it's hard to let go of past things that were detrimental to ones mental health – but without those things I would not be where I am now. And so it's hard to appreciate the pain for the stepping stone it became, when all you want to do is forget that it ever existed or ever hurt. If that makes sense. I suppose that's one of the things life is about – using the pain of the past to construct a more balanced, happier future.
That's what we need to do though. Use our failures of the past to see that they led to the successes of the present and hopefully the future.
Wednesday, 18 February 2009
Tuesday Stats
I've been fighting off a cold/flu thing for the past week. My immune system is pretty solid because I partake of Astragulus every day, and i've been taking it for almost a year.
so when I get sick i'm still functioning, i just get symptoms one at a time and they don't really hurt or irritate me. Last week I had a headache all week, all week. It was one of those low, dull, niggling, constant ones. Lame.
And this week I have a sore throat. Although I think that's going away today.
Last week I also fell over a number of times and bruised a lot of myself, so I think i had ear ache as well, but on a miniscule scale.
I went swimming yesterday, because it boosts the immune system and makes things happy again – doing exercise that is. I think it also spreads disease and infection to anyone else in the water. Alas. I am a cow.
However, I wasn't really feeling it, so my session was back to normal and I was swimming 2000yds in 55 minutes. I hate not having a meter pool here. Really. That extra meter and a half makes all the difference to my stroke.
Stats
200yds FC
200yds BS
100yds BC
100yds BF
(with flippers)
200yds FC legs
50yds BC legs
50yds BF legs
100yds BS legs
(with paddles)
200yds FC arms
50yds BC arms
50yds BF arms
100yds BS arms
400yds FC arms legs flippers paddles
8x25yds FC/BS 25yds sprint FC.
50yds swim down
Total: 200yds time: 55 minutes.
I then walked to the institute building and bumped into Poulson and he sat with me through the lecture, which was rather interesting, given that a year ago he and I were not friends. Hmmm. Alas. His eyes were as bloodshot as ever. As soon as it ended I walked off, drifted per say. I wasn't going to hang about and boost his ego or something by looking like I wanted to be part of his crew and talk to him and what not.
On my walk to the institute building my hair froze. it was quite spectacular. I tried to take pictures of it, but it didn't really come out too well.
I only had me wee camera with me, but I wish I had had my big one with a tripod there would have been some beautiful shots with a slow shutter speed. Alas. I was on foot and public transport so I was trying to travel as light as possible. Here's a couple of potential shots that would have been better with the Big Canon.
On my way home on the trax there was a random man, that I thought was my friend Matt, but wasn't, and I'm so pleased that I didn't sit next to him and talk to him. But this half Jamaican was taking pictures of random people on the train, and he took like 2 or 3 of me. I didn't care so much. I think if I did that would make me a hypocrit. I have a crap load of pictures of people that I thought looked cool. I'm just a bit more subtle at picture taking than this stoner was.
Anyway, my favourite sign on the trax, and I don't know if i've blogged about this before, but I love it is this one:
Shirt and Shoes is a requirement. Always remember that.
I was wearing my Uggs yesterday and my feet were cosier than a sheep. Well as cosy as a sheep. So I was taking some pictures for a blog that I contribute to called Gypsy Feet, owned by the awesome Laura. None of these really worked out or captured the essence of what I was going for. That and Uggs aren't made for the snow. Contrary to popular belief. They are not water proof, they stain in the snow and wet, and they don't have a good grip. In fact, while walking in these after being in the snow I felt like I was elevated 2cm off the ground. The snow just caked to the bottom, it was weird. I also decided to risk the potential of stainage to get some good golden boot shots in the snow. I'm sad none of them turned out good enough. Maybe I'll go out again today with my big camera. Once I get some work done. :)
Also, if anyone has any freelance design work that needs doing, give me a bell. Vizzle M needs work and money.
xxx
so when I get sick i'm still functioning, i just get symptoms one at a time and they don't really hurt or irritate me. Last week I had a headache all week, all week. It was one of those low, dull, niggling, constant ones. Lame.
And this week I have a sore throat. Although I think that's going away today.
Last week I also fell over a number of times and bruised a lot of myself, so I think i had ear ache as well, but on a miniscule scale.
I went swimming yesterday, because it boosts the immune system and makes things happy again – doing exercise that is. I think it also spreads disease and infection to anyone else in the water. Alas. I am a cow.
However, I wasn't really feeling it, so my session was back to normal and I was swimming 2000yds in 55 minutes. I hate not having a meter pool here. Really. That extra meter and a half makes all the difference to my stroke.
Stats
200yds FC
200yds BS
100yds BC
100yds BF
(with flippers)
200yds FC legs
50yds BC legs
50yds BF legs
100yds BS legs
(with paddles)
200yds FC arms
50yds BC arms
50yds BF arms
100yds BS arms
400yds FC arms legs flippers paddles
8x25yds FC/BS 25yds sprint FC.
50yds swim down
Total: 200yds time: 55 minutes.
I then walked to the institute building and bumped into Poulson and he sat with me through the lecture, which was rather interesting, given that a year ago he and I were not friends. Hmmm. Alas. His eyes were as bloodshot as ever. As soon as it ended I walked off, drifted per say. I wasn't going to hang about and boost his ego or something by looking like I wanted to be part of his crew and talk to him and what not.
On my walk to the institute building my hair froze. it was quite spectacular. I tried to take pictures of it, but it didn't really come out too well.
I only had me wee camera with me, but I wish I had had my big one with a tripod there would have been some beautiful shots with a slow shutter speed. Alas. I was on foot and public transport so I was trying to travel as light as possible. Here's a couple of potential shots that would have been better with the Big Canon.
On my way home on the trax there was a random man, that I thought was my friend Matt, but wasn't, and I'm so pleased that I didn't sit next to him and talk to him. But this half Jamaican was taking pictures of random people on the train, and he took like 2 or 3 of me. I didn't care so much. I think if I did that would make me a hypocrit. I have a crap load of pictures of people that I thought looked cool. I'm just a bit more subtle at picture taking than this stoner was.
Anyway, my favourite sign on the trax, and I don't know if i've blogged about this before, but I love it is this one:
Shirt and Shoes is a requirement. Always remember that.
I was wearing my Uggs yesterday and my feet were cosier than a sheep. Well as cosy as a sheep. So I was taking some pictures for a blog that I contribute to called Gypsy Feet, owned by the awesome Laura. None of these really worked out or captured the essence of what I was going for. That and Uggs aren't made for the snow. Contrary to popular belief. They are not water proof, they stain in the snow and wet, and they don't have a good grip. In fact, while walking in these after being in the snow I felt like I was elevated 2cm off the ground. The snow just caked to the bottom, it was weird. I also decided to risk the potential of stainage to get some good golden boot shots in the snow. I'm sad none of them turned out good enough. Maybe I'll go out again today with my big camera. Once I get some work done. :)
Also, if anyone has any freelance design work that needs doing, give me a bell. Vizzle M needs work and money.
xxx
Tuesday, 17 February 2009
Dress.
So, I found this dress on ebay a while ago, in a size 2. The 0 fitted but was a little tight. So I was humming and hawing over what size and if it would fit and if I wanted to pay £130 for it, and this and that and the next thing. Then I was speaking to ericka yesterday and she said do it. It's for Toni's wedding and subsequently will be used to Mary's wedding. Hopefully neither one will notice.
Anyway, I ended up pushing buy it now and then felt so utter unappeased because it wouldn't let me bid because I was british. There was a block on the .co.uk accounts. So I emailed the girl and asked if I could bid. I then got out of bed (because it was 2pm), and started cleaning.
I scrubbed the toilet, bleached all the sinks (three of them), changed bed sheets, cleaned the coffee table, did all the dishes, sewed two belt loops on a pair of trousers that had broken (I did a soild job of that I might add, while watching scrubs and Dead Like Me), Washed and dried the other bed sheets, folded some washing, cleaned all the worktops and I think that was it. Then I signed in online again to see if my email had been answered. It had. I was now able to bid. Two hours had passed. I went onto the page and couldn't find the buy it now button. It had gone. Where was it. Then I realised the auction had ended and I had not won. Someone else had bid in the two hours I had waited for the dress to be open to me. So mad. So mad. I felt like I was being punished for cleaning or something.
I was in a huff and a half.
Right before going to bed I checked ebay out of general curiosity to see if there was any more of the dress just listed. My chances were slim, I doubted it greatly, however... this was on offer.
I didn't know what to do... a size 4. Would it be too big. Stupidly I emailed the person asking if they had a size 2 (because the listing says such things). I got a reply this morning that they only had the 4 or a 0. 10 seconds later I bought the 4. Here's hoping it works out. We'll know in 3-5 days. It's coming from Arizona, so hopefully it won't be too long.
EXCITED DOT COM. The best part about it is that I can leave it here until may as well. Awesome.
So that was the excitement for my day.
I think, today, I might start writing my novel again and or do a typographic piece. I miss doing typography for arts sake.
I am Vikki T Miller Mdes Bdes (Hons) MISTD (member of the international society of typographic designers) afterall. M M M M EGA.
and when they were assessing my work submitted for that title they looked at mine as one of the first and used it to compare all the other work to. I set the standard for entry. I kid you not. So anyone that got better than me got commendations.
One day, I hope my letters are FISTD. Ahhhh the STD. I love them. I also owe them money. Maybe i'll ask to be in their club next year again.
Anyway, I ended up pushing buy it now and then felt so utter unappeased because it wouldn't let me bid because I was british. There was a block on the .co.uk accounts. So I emailed the girl and asked if I could bid. I then got out of bed (because it was 2pm), and started cleaning.
I scrubbed the toilet, bleached all the sinks (three of them), changed bed sheets, cleaned the coffee table, did all the dishes, sewed two belt loops on a pair of trousers that had broken (I did a soild job of that I might add, while watching scrubs and Dead Like Me), Washed and dried the other bed sheets, folded some washing, cleaned all the worktops and I think that was it. Then I signed in online again to see if my email had been answered. It had. I was now able to bid. Two hours had passed. I went onto the page and couldn't find the buy it now button. It had gone. Where was it. Then I realised the auction had ended and I had not won. Someone else had bid in the two hours I had waited for the dress to be open to me. So mad. So mad. I felt like I was being punished for cleaning or something.
I was in a huff and a half.
Right before going to bed I checked ebay out of general curiosity to see if there was any more of the dress just listed. My chances were slim, I doubted it greatly, however... this was on offer.
I didn't know what to do... a size 4. Would it be too big. Stupidly I emailed the person asking if they had a size 2 (because the listing says such things). I got a reply this morning that they only had the 4 or a 0. 10 seconds later I bought the 4. Here's hoping it works out. We'll know in 3-5 days. It's coming from Arizona, so hopefully it won't be too long.
EXCITED DOT COM. The best part about it is that I can leave it here until may as well. Awesome.
So that was the excitement for my day.
I think, today, I might start writing my novel again and or do a typographic piece. I miss doing typography for arts sake.
I am Vikki T Miller Mdes Bdes (Hons) MISTD (member of the international society of typographic designers) afterall. M M M M EGA.
and when they were assessing my work submitted for that title they looked at mine as one of the first and used it to compare all the other work to. I set the standard for entry. I kid you not. So anyone that got better than me got commendations.
One day, I hope my letters are FISTD. Ahhhh the STD. I love them. I also owe them money. Maybe i'll ask to be in their club next year again.
Saturday, 25 October 2008
Another Whinny Essay... seriously. I need to stop.
I just submitted this to adbusters. Not my finest piece of writing, but let's face it, I am slacking these days. Lack of reading equals lack of quality writing. Alas. Enjoy.
A Call For Superheroes.
Now is the time to forget the rules; all bets are off. Now is the time to shed our contemporary consumer society costumes, and truly reveal the superheroes within ourselves.
The concept of superheroes is not unusual, they have been part of our fantasy culture for decades and they cross international cultures and barriers. I would go as far as saying that as long as man has existed he has always dreamed of having super-natural powers and abilities that set him apart from everyone else and give him authority to help and save the world, or at least help with his labour.
What's not so commonly recognised is the similarities of superheroes to the contemporary consumer world. Superheroes don masks, capes and lycra snug-fitting outfits and alter their identities to conceal who they are, or rather augment who they want to be: a crime fighter; a life saver; a bringer of justice. We are guilty of doing such things with our own purchases, and our own everyday clothes. We buy things that will make us feel like who we want to be and that we think will display our inner personality to the outside world. Really we are just fitting into genres and shoe-horning our lives into a brand we think we identify with. We have been behaving like superficial superheroes for decades, but this is now a call for real superheroes: for people to realise their potential and realise the difference they can make in this world.
No, we don't have any kind of super natural powers, but I don't think that possessing abilities beyond reality would actually help, but more so hinder. This is up to us. We don't need a mask, a cape, or any kind of special outfit. We don't need powers, or to have been born on another planet. We really don't need to conceal our identities or suppress who we are any longer. The pressure to conform to a certain genre and to appeal to the people already leading that niche of society has reached boiling point and we can now free ourselves. It's time to let our superhero selves reign supreme. We need to save the planet, and we need to do it as superheroes.
Let's shed our brands, and our obsession with spending. Let's start to help the people we know and the people we don't know; let's talk to our neighbours and save society; let's go outside and experience nature and appreciate how intrinsically linked to it we are; let's make amends with our family and friends and have no animosity; let's look at the sky and realise how wonderful and beautiful it is; let's not fear our own culture, anyone else's culture and especially not religion; let's stop working so many hours, and stop wanting gadgets, brands, and things beyond need; let's say no more to being psychologically tormented and depressed by the cold world we have invented; let's listen to the young and the old; let's cook real food and no longer be a slave to work and the microwave meals made for convenience; let's realise that the things we own will not afford us one iota of real happiness; let's design things that will help people rather than things to make money; let's put down the TV remote and read books; let's enjoy life and realise that memories are what make it; let's learn from each other and never stop learning; let's care about the world; let's care about people; let's be happy; let's care about oppression, war, and let's no longer stand for corruption among our 'leaders'. We have the power to rise up and take back the planet that is ours. Let's change the world, let's be superheroes – together.
A Call For Superheroes.
Now is the time to forget the rules; all bets are off. Now is the time to shed our contemporary consumer society costumes, and truly reveal the superheroes within ourselves.
The concept of superheroes is not unusual, they have been part of our fantasy culture for decades and they cross international cultures and barriers. I would go as far as saying that as long as man has existed he has always dreamed of having super-natural powers and abilities that set him apart from everyone else and give him authority to help and save the world, or at least help with his labour.
What's not so commonly recognised is the similarities of superheroes to the contemporary consumer world. Superheroes don masks, capes and lycra snug-fitting outfits and alter their identities to conceal who they are, or rather augment who they want to be: a crime fighter; a life saver; a bringer of justice. We are guilty of doing such things with our own purchases, and our own everyday clothes. We buy things that will make us feel like who we want to be and that we think will display our inner personality to the outside world. Really we are just fitting into genres and shoe-horning our lives into a brand we think we identify with. We have been behaving like superficial superheroes for decades, but this is now a call for real superheroes: for people to realise their potential and realise the difference they can make in this world.
No, we don't have any kind of super natural powers, but I don't think that possessing abilities beyond reality would actually help, but more so hinder. This is up to us. We don't need a mask, a cape, or any kind of special outfit. We don't need powers, or to have been born on another planet. We really don't need to conceal our identities or suppress who we are any longer. The pressure to conform to a certain genre and to appeal to the people already leading that niche of society has reached boiling point and we can now free ourselves. It's time to let our superhero selves reign supreme. We need to save the planet, and we need to do it as superheroes.
Let's shed our brands, and our obsession with spending. Let's start to help the people we know and the people we don't know; let's talk to our neighbours and save society; let's go outside and experience nature and appreciate how intrinsically linked to it we are; let's make amends with our family and friends and have no animosity; let's look at the sky and realise how wonderful and beautiful it is; let's not fear our own culture, anyone else's culture and especially not religion; let's stop working so many hours, and stop wanting gadgets, brands, and things beyond need; let's say no more to being psychologically tormented and depressed by the cold world we have invented; let's listen to the young and the old; let's cook real food and no longer be a slave to work and the microwave meals made for convenience; let's realise that the things we own will not afford us one iota of real happiness; let's design things that will help people rather than things to make money; let's put down the TV remote and read books; let's enjoy life and realise that memories are what make it; let's learn from each other and never stop learning; let's care about the world; let's care about people; let's be happy; let's care about oppression, war, and let's no longer stand for corruption among our 'leaders'. We have the power to rise up and take back the planet that is ours. Let's change the world, let's be superheroes – together.
Tuesday, 7 October 2008
I KNOW that you would love me if...
... I owned these shoes.
that is why I must go on a hunt to find them.
Hunt for the red october.
Or rather, hunt for the multi-coloured DC october.
Tell me this you me though... I can't remember what I was going to say. I've decided my violin is called Charlie.. pictures to follow. I sat on an M&M... pictures to follow. I went to general conference and was looking for famous people again... pictures to follow.
Last night was heroes night with marcus and josie. so good. SO GOOD I tell thee. It was also work day, Sunday was all about conference, James Bond (Sean Connery style) and Southpark. Today is all about getting the vegan sandwich from Addicted Cafe, finding a cadbury flake and hopefully playing Charlie with Pedro before I meet marcus and go to institute.
ALSO.. oh my gosh. I've had this random blackhead on the right of my face for months now. I can't remember when it first appeared but I stopped attacking it because last May I tried to get it and ended up with a massive cut on my face rather than no blackhead, and all it did was Highlight the black head guy. So in the past week it grew a friend next to and some symmetrical guys on the left side. So last night I said enough is enough, got the three new friends out and I was about to leave the original, but I decided to give it a try. After about 10 minutes he finally vacated my face, and did he owe me rent? Oh yes he did. But that blackhead has been evicted from the Vikki Miller face house. He was quite solid, and shaped like a triangular prism. He was sturdy :) Let's remember his best moments to the song Back in Black.
Or not... we could just give him the tongs and tell him to Get The Fruit :)
that is why I must go on a hunt to find them.
Hunt for the red october.
Or rather, hunt for the multi-coloured DC october.
Tell me this you me though... I can't remember what I was going to say. I've decided my violin is called Charlie.. pictures to follow. I sat on an M&M... pictures to follow. I went to general conference and was looking for famous people again... pictures to follow.
Last night was heroes night with marcus and josie. so good. SO GOOD I tell thee. It was also work day, Sunday was all about conference, James Bond (Sean Connery style) and Southpark. Today is all about getting the vegan sandwich from Addicted Cafe, finding a cadbury flake and hopefully playing Charlie with Pedro before I meet marcus and go to institute.
ALSO.. oh my gosh. I've had this random blackhead on the right of my face for months now. I can't remember when it first appeared but I stopped attacking it because last May I tried to get it and ended up with a massive cut on my face rather than no blackhead, and all it did was Highlight the black head guy. So in the past week it grew a friend next to and some symmetrical guys on the left side. So last night I said enough is enough, got the three new friends out and I was about to leave the original, but I decided to give it a try. After about 10 minutes he finally vacated my face, and did he owe me rent? Oh yes he did. But that blackhead has been evicted from the Vikki Miller face house. He was quite solid, and shaped like a triangular prism. He was sturdy :) Let's remember his best moments to the song Back in Black.
Or not... we could just give him the tongs and tell him to Get The Fruit :)
Monday, 22 September 2008
When the Moon Hits your Eye Like a BIG pizza pie, that's Italy.
I have vanished into a land of nothingness (the nothing like in the never ending story) since I got back from Italy.
And now, it's time, for, the, Italy, blog. , , ,
I set off from my house at around 7am, I was catching the 7:30am train to Prestwick... which got me in so SUPER early that I could have had another 30 minutes in bed at least. Doh.
I always leave packing to the last minute which means I don't get to bed until a crazy time and then I don't want to go anywhere any more because all I want to do is sleep. I am a fool.
Prestwick were being idiots and they made me pay £1 for four plastic bags from a vending machine to put my lip balm in. What a joke. It doesn't even have to be in a bag. I actually had to ask a lady for a pound coin for two fifties and we were all totally held up then by the stupid bag rule. Man I was so mad. I got over it though, and went on with my life, that involved sitting. Luckily Kate called me at the airport and I was able to kill some time.
The best part about being British and flying with an airline that has no assigned seating is the strange fascination people have with queuing. It's great to sit there and watch Brits queue when they've not been told to. It happened with the Dublin flight, and then again with my own flight to London. People just started queueing because someone, around the time of boarding, got up for a wizz. It's madness.
Anyway, everyone started queueing, my flight was called, and then I hung up with Kate and nipped to the loo. I've never had to use the toilet on Ryanair and I hope I never have to.
There were perhaps 4 people behind me, the queue went by quickly, and I was one person from the front. I had just walked past a middle eastern looking man who was out of the count and a half. He was pretty much comatose on the seat. I had this overwhelming feeling that I should wake him up. So I left the queue and skipped back to him and poked him and prodded him. For a while I thought he was dead, but he finally woke up and he was, indeed, meant to be getting on my flight. So I was pleased that I had helped him not to miss it.
I had a million hour lay over in Stanstead, which I filled with buying the Catcher in the Rye (again) and eating in Pret a Manger. I love that shop so much. Their food is beyond amazing.
I also took some pictures of Donkey and Oinker. Yes I took them with me, yes I photographed them a lot, and yes they now have their own blog.
On the plane to Naples I was sitting next to a man and lady, who switched seats half way through the journey. The man was reading the easy jet book so I offered him my Times magazine, he declined. I continued to sleep randomly in a strange and odd curled up position. I will damage my back one day sleeping the way I do on planes.
We got to Naples and I thought I saw Alexis, Donna's friend from Edinburgh, but I decided it wasn't her and then set about getting my own bag. I then bumped into the man and lady I had been sitting next to on the plane. And then I just took off.
I got outside and was looking for the tourist information or the bus depot but instead found a taxi man who bundled me in his car without my 100% consent under the pretence that he would take me to the train station for 2 Euro???
I know.
On the way there I started wondering if he was even a taxi driver. The air was so warm, and he was driving like a crazy crazy nut. He kept asking if I wanted him to drive me all the way to Sorrento for 120 Euros. To which I told him to bolt.
Rather than taking me to the big train station he took me to the dodgy one. Thank you taxi man, which was further away, and which had scarier people.
After charging me THIRTY Euros and me getting really nasty and cowish towards him – because he pretty much robbed me – he brought me into the train station and spoke to the lady behind the desk to get my ticket. I paid up and then he gave me a hug goodbye. I forgot to mention that the entire time in the taxi he kept being sleazy and weird, and kissing my hand.
So when we were parting he kissed my cheek, and gave me a half hug... THEN... THEN he went for it... he went for a proper kiss. I totally shoved him away and he was like...' no no no kiss? how much how much?'
To which I replied, NO MUCH... and then ran off down the stairs to the train station.
Downstairs wasn't much friendlier. It was vacant, vandalised and very unfamiliar.
There were four backpackers over in the corner so I sat with them and kind of eary wigged their conversation. They were heading to sorrento too, so I just decided to follow them.
The train station looked like this:
and I think this turned out to actually be our train.
The inside was basic - plastic seats, lino floor and dirty windows. I sat and read the catcher in the rye with my headphones on and any scariness was gone. There were a bunch of Londoners on the train too.
We arrived in Sorrento and I walked to the hostel, couldn't find it, and kept wandering about. I found Donna and Daniel's hotel, which was pumping 'YMCA'. Amazing. And then I finally worked out that the street my hostel was on went underneath the road I was looking for a right turn. It was more of a right turn and jump. When I arrived the man at the desk knew me by name. Crazy. I went to my room and after making beds and rifling through bags I was pretty much asleep instantaneously. Man it was so hot, the air conditioning was on and at about 7am I woke up freezing. It was so odd. I had to put on a hoody while sleeping.
There was no window, so I slept in quite a bit, had a shower and then wandered about the streets of Sorrento.
Everything that is an Italian stereotype is true. It's insane. Scooters everywhere.
and tiny tiny streets with cars driving up them regardless of people. It's really crazy.
And a lot of Jesus. :)
After wandering for a bit I headed down to the shore and paddled around in the Mediterranean sea. Amazing.
On my journey I found an amazing cat, which spoke to me in Italian. I swear it did. You have to listen to the little bits the cat actually says and not me... its high pitched and slow... Very Italian sounding. Well to me anyway. Haha.
I hoofed it back to the hostel, got changed for the wedding, then set off to the most beautiful wedding either. I swear it was amazing. So pretty. How many people are ever married with grapes growing behind them. Seriously. Amazing.
I'm so pleased I went, I would have regretted it if I didn't.
While we were waiting for Donna to arrive a man and lady walked into the cloisters and I swear I knew them from somewhere. And it turned out to be the couple I was sitting next to on the plane. SERIOUSLY. And then Alexis and her friend Alexis showed up and it WAS the girl I had seen at the airport. So the majority of the non-family guests were all on the same plane from London to Naples. How crazy is that? Haha.
Amazing.
Wedding feet.
There was dinner, there was drinks, there was chatting, there was everything amazing. It was such a good day.
The next day, much to everyone's worry, I set off for Naples via Pompeii.
Pompeii was pretty cool, and they had a free left luggage, so I didn't have to drag my backpack all around that sweaty place. It was so hot, so dirty and so BIG.
I ended up following the Chinese people all around, I kept loosing them and walking off but I would always find them, or they me. It was amusing. I wish I could have spoken Chinese so I could hear their tour guide.
I hadn't eaten anything for breakfast and just kept drinking water. I had a packet of polos that I'd bought in London and kept chewing them. Then a familiar logo flashed before my eyes and I got really mad. WHEN DID NESTLE TAKE OVER POLO. That's why he spearmint flavour no longer has green bits in it. I was so mad. I still finished the packet though, and then raged about it for a while.
One of the Chinese tourists stopped and showed me a picture of a petrified person, and asked if I had seen those people anywhere. I told him, I was looking for the same thing.
Sure enough, when we parted ways, in different directions, and when I found the people, he was there too. I tell you, I was with them the whole way.
While I was taking pictures of Donkey and Oinker this lady walked past me and said 'Tiene un psycho.' I don't have to be able to speak Spanish to know what she saying about me. HAHA.
Pompeii bogging feet.
I then caught the train the rest of the way to Naples, and there was a guy on the train that kept looking at me strangely, but then not. It was one of those 'you're a backpacker, I'm a backpacker, we should be friends, we have stuff in common' kind of looks. It killed time watching him watch me though.
I then walked around Naples, here's a thought, when you give directions give people the real name of the street rather than the local made up name. Man I was so mad. I found the street, but it didn't match the name I had so I kept walking around and about. By the time I got to the hostel I was sweating to death. I swear, from the second I stepped off the plane until the rain came down I was just constantly sweating and too hot. Utter madness.
The hostel was really close to the train station and I seemed to have walked the most scenic route to get there. It was run by a nice man who gave me a map and a guide to the quick walking tour of Naples.
I felt like there was so much life there, so much character. After being in tourist spots this felt like home. It was amazing. I loved it.
The hostel man also told me where to go for pizza, and I tell you, I have been spoiled, never again will I ever taste pizza like that. Not unless I go back to Naples. I swear it was the best thing I've ever had.
And it was all wood burning fire cooked by this man. He was so amazing.
After filling myself, I wandered around the streets. There was a lot of people begging for money, and a lot of people performing. I met this man who clocked me for British as soon as I stood next to him. I think it was because I was so pale.
I ended up at mass, I sat in real catholic Italian mass for about 15 minutes before going back out onto the streets. I think the secret is to not behave or act like a victim, not to stare too much at people, and pretty much use common sense, it's like being in Glasgow. Seriously.
I was walking down a main shopping street and I was so impressed that there were no major chain stores or anything. It felt so nice. I saw 0 starbucks'. I tried to communicate with a lady asking me about donkey and oinker. Spanish and English were no good. All I was looking for was the word art. But I couldn't explain it.
I wandered further down the street and these two men spoke to me for about 10 minutes. The one on the left spoke english and Italian, the one on the right spoke Italian and Spanish. So I spoke to the left one in English, The right one in Spanish and they spoke Italian to each other. It was one of the greatest things I've ever done in my life. I loved it. And I even got to say the words 'El Policia' to the Spanish speaker, because I was talking about the left guy who was a service guard or something. It was amazing haha. Just like Ben Stiller in Anchorman.
Feral Dog.
This was the outside of the pizza place I was at earlier. It was totally full when it got later. Amazing.
But I was going for Gelato.
The dark alley.
When I was leaving a Japanese girl called Masami asked if we could travel to Rome together. I said I would meet her at the train station and that I wanted to wander through the market outside. While wandering through the stolen and fake trainers and bags and people heckling me to buy their things and me telling them I had shoes and I didn't need any, there was an eruption of panicked chatter. One word repeated over and over echoing down the market. Then every dodgy person grabbed their goods and started running. They had everything in/on an easily liftable bag or table. They just started running, and then seconds later a cop car drove down the market. It was crazy. Once the cops had left all the men came back.
It was a crazy market and I couldn't resist whipping out the SLR to try and photograph it. Idiotic move.
Just as the market had erupted in chatter before, it did again, but this time to the word photographia. Now, whether they thought I was the fraud police, or whether they wanted my camera, I don't know. Needless to say, after two shots, I quickly exited.
I met Masami at the train station, and we travelled to Roma. After a 20 minute hunt for the tourist information place, we went to my hostel which was crazy, and filled with European boys half-naked in the bathroom. Shared multi cubicle bathroom? It was weird. Very weird.
I changed my shoes and set about Rome. First to the colosseum, which was large, interesting, and old.
I did seem more enthralled with my M&Ms though. The M&Ms I had to buy to get changed of a 10 Euro because the shop man refused to sell me a twix for change, and before that I had to get a 10 Euro from the bank because the machine in the station wouldn't take a card for a 4 Euro 24 hour ticket. I just didn't understand. And I couldn't locate my change purse. I decided I'd left it in the hostel. I still haven't found it, so either I was pick pocketed in Naples, which is unlikely, or I left it in the hostel in Naples. Meh.
It was a rigmarole trying to get the ticket nonetheless. When I finally got it I went to the colosseum. Then to the Vatican, and then to the Trevi fountain when it was just getting dark.
The Vatican was ace. Although it was totally the wrong religion, it was still interesting and Jesus Christ was on top of it, right above where the pope gives his wee talks.
Jesus Christ IS on top of that building, with his twelve disciples.
The inside of the Vatican.
The outside of the Vatican. (This is where I was being blasphemous.)
This shop was amazing, it was filled with Baby Jesus'. I'll let me tell you though in the video.
I then went over to the Trevi fountain and found this man:
on the way. I love that he is using a shoe on his hand. That's innovation.
The fountain was swarming with people, it was pretty and all but I was Hunger-yyy. So I started wandering the streets looking for eats. I knew that if I stayed near the fountain I would be charged a fortune for Western Italian food, and I was dying for some pasta. I've never been able to have pasta that topped the stuff I had in Little Italy in New York in 2006. So i was looking and trying.
I finally settled on a restaurant because 1. I was weary, 2. The man at the door told me what the best thing on the menu was, 3. He didn't lie.
I sat outside and they sat me next to a table with three people at it, but I was slightly outside the canopy. There was thunder and lightening and then it started to spit... the waiter told me that it was fine and there would be no more than that. As a precaution the three Americans at the table next to me invited me to sit in with them. I was pleased to, and moment later the heavens opened and the sea poured out of the sky. It was mad. The whole right side of me was wet from the constant splashing of water.
The three people were so interesting though. They were from the university of Tennessee and they were there for a diabetes conference. I was telling them all about me, my life, my research etc etc and they were discussing mormonism with me and how one of the guys they work with is a member and they used to work with another guy who moved to Idaho so his children would marry members. It was brilliant, and there was never any awkward silences, and the pasta was incredible. IN CRED IBLE. And then I ordered hot chocolate. The air was warm, the rain cooling and hot chocolate was a perfect weight, temperature and flavour that just made the moment I drank/ate it the best of my life. I swear.
One of the Americans walked me back to the Metro station because he was going the same way, we ran through the streets of Rome soaking wet with the cities finest entrepreneurs selling us umbrellas that they must have had in reserve at home waiting for the rain to pour. Amazing.
I think I can honestly say that I will never run through rome again soaked to the skin, with a university lecturer from American that I met 2 hours before. It was brilliant.
We parted ways at the Termini station and wished each other those fake pleasantries for future travelling etc etc.
I headed back to the hostel and almost died I was so tired.
Masami had spent the day getting her plans together for the future days. She is my utter hero. She's 34, she was an office worker, and one day she quit and she's been travelling since May with no real time of when she's going home. Possible October, possibly not. She's been to Cambodia, Thailand, India, England, and now Italy. I'm not sure where else in Europe she'd been but I'm sure she had been other places too. She is my utter hero.
I met a tonne of solo backpackers. People that would just quit and travel, Australians and Americans mostly. It inspires me to do it. The leaving would be the hardest, but once I was on the road, I would be fine, I think. Amazing.
While I was brushing my teeth that night I stood at the open window which opened onto a bit of a balcony. I stood there and watched the rain trickle down, and I watched the beginning of 'Snatch' on a TV through another open window, and I watched another person hang their clothes in their house. It's moments like that, that make my life I think. When things are so peaceful and the world is just getting on with it. I think it's beautiful.
While I was away, the entire time I was worried that I might have been talking in my sleep. On the fourth night in Rome I woke myself up about 6am when I was trying to say some kind of long sentence, what I remember saying was something like 'well, I don't think that's very nice at all, you... '
I can't remember how it was going to end though. But I woke up and got really embarrassed haha. But then I got over it and went back to sleep.
When I woke up for real for real Masami and I got ready and left together, and I decided that I had six hours so I could see a couple of things and get another hot chocolate a pizza then hit the road for the plane station.
My left foot hurt a little, but I thought nothing of it, Masami and I parted ways and I headed towards the Trevi fountain again to see the Pantheon.
As I was walking off the metro my foot started to agonise. It felt like nerves were catching in the bone. It was the sorest pain. What took me 5 minutes to walk the night before took me about 20 because the pain was so much and it kept increasing.
I ate some random pastries outside the Trevi Fountain where I chatted to a man from Holland. And then continued my walk to the Pantheon via pharmacies and sports shops. Finally I found some kind of bandage for my foot, which I put on outside a church that someone was getting married in. I'm lovely.
My foot was lovelier. Haha.
I ambled my way to the Pantheon where this amazing video was filmed.
I then thought of trying to go to the park near the colosseum, but by the time I got back to the metro there was only really time to go back to the hostel, eat some pizza and catch the bus. While eating pizza I happened to chat to two Australians, again solo travellers that had found each other, one was hanging about until he went to Johannesburg, the other was off to work in the UK for 1 - 2 years. Either London or Glasgow. He was nice, I wish I had been a true Scot and given him contact details in case he was up this way. I suck. I never even got his name. I think that's the beauty of backpacking though. People start to get realistic. They realise that they can't keep in touch with everyone, so they enjoy each other's company for what it is, a few brief hours, one night, and then just keep the memories. No complication, its like the unwritten rule of backpacking. It's just like wee John told me, It's easier to get from A to B if you make friends along the way. That drunk man knew his stuff.
I then got myself tipsy in the airport on a liqueur. AND if you thought Prestwick was bad, try flying out of Ciampino. It was horrid. After getting tipsy, the plane being delayed, and the travel pills kicking in, I was almost unconscious in the airport.
I finished reading the Catcher in the Rye on the train to central, where I had my mum come pick me up because I was in so much foot pain agony.
I even met another solo traveller on the train to Central and he had a strange accent, but he was actually English, living in Inverness, and was in Rome for the diabetes conference too... AND I kid you not, he said the reason he had a strange accent was because he had been in Italy for those few days and he picked up the accent. OH SHUT UP. No one picks up an accent that quickly...
but apparently he does.
And now, it's time, for, the, Italy, blog. , , ,
I set off from my house at around 7am, I was catching the 7:30am train to Prestwick... which got me in so SUPER early that I could have had another 30 minutes in bed at least. Doh.
I always leave packing to the last minute which means I don't get to bed until a crazy time and then I don't want to go anywhere any more because all I want to do is sleep. I am a fool.
Prestwick were being idiots and they made me pay £1 for four plastic bags from a vending machine to put my lip balm in. What a joke. It doesn't even have to be in a bag. I actually had to ask a lady for a pound coin for two fifties and we were all totally held up then by the stupid bag rule. Man I was so mad. I got over it though, and went on with my life, that involved sitting. Luckily Kate called me at the airport and I was able to kill some time.
The best part about being British and flying with an airline that has no assigned seating is the strange fascination people have with queuing. It's great to sit there and watch Brits queue when they've not been told to. It happened with the Dublin flight, and then again with my own flight to London. People just started queueing because someone, around the time of boarding, got up for a wizz. It's madness.
Anyway, everyone started queueing, my flight was called, and then I hung up with Kate and nipped to the loo. I've never had to use the toilet on Ryanair and I hope I never have to.
There were perhaps 4 people behind me, the queue went by quickly, and I was one person from the front. I had just walked past a middle eastern looking man who was out of the count and a half. He was pretty much comatose on the seat. I had this overwhelming feeling that I should wake him up. So I left the queue and skipped back to him and poked him and prodded him. For a while I thought he was dead, but he finally woke up and he was, indeed, meant to be getting on my flight. So I was pleased that I had helped him not to miss it.
I had a million hour lay over in Stanstead, which I filled with buying the Catcher in the Rye (again) and eating in Pret a Manger. I love that shop so much. Their food is beyond amazing.
I also took some pictures of Donkey and Oinker. Yes I took them with me, yes I photographed them a lot, and yes they now have their own blog.
On the plane to Naples I was sitting next to a man and lady, who switched seats half way through the journey. The man was reading the easy jet book so I offered him my Times magazine, he declined. I continued to sleep randomly in a strange and odd curled up position. I will damage my back one day sleeping the way I do on planes.
We got to Naples and I thought I saw Alexis, Donna's friend from Edinburgh, but I decided it wasn't her and then set about getting my own bag. I then bumped into the man and lady I had been sitting next to on the plane. And then I just took off.
I got outside and was looking for the tourist information or the bus depot but instead found a taxi man who bundled me in his car without my 100% consent under the pretence that he would take me to the train station for 2 Euro???
I know.
On the way there I started wondering if he was even a taxi driver. The air was so warm, and he was driving like a crazy crazy nut. He kept asking if I wanted him to drive me all the way to Sorrento for 120 Euros. To which I told him to bolt.
Rather than taking me to the big train station he took me to the dodgy one. Thank you taxi man, which was further away, and which had scarier people.
After charging me THIRTY Euros and me getting really nasty and cowish towards him – because he pretty much robbed me – he brought me into the train station and spoke to the lady behind the desk to get my ticket. I paid up and then he gave me a hug goodbye. I forgot to mention that the entire time in the taxi he kept being sleazy and weird, and kissing my hand.
So when we were parting he kissed my cheek, and gave me a half hug... THEN... THEN he went for it... he went for a proper kiss. I totally shoved him away and he was like...' no no no kiss? how much how much?'
To which I replied, NO MUCH... and then ran off down the stairs to the train station.
Downstairs wasn't much friendlier. It was vacant, vandalised and very unfamiliar.
There were four backpackers over in the corner so I sat with them and kind of eary wigged their conversation. They were heading to sorrento too, so I just decided to follow them.
The train station looked like this:
and I think this turned out to actually be our train.
The inside was basic - plastic seats, lino floor and dirty windows. I sat and read the catcher in the rye with my headphones on and any scariness was gone. There were a bunch of Londoners on the train too.
We arrived in Sorrento and I walked to the hostel, couldn't find it, and kept wandering about. I found Donna and Daniel's hotel, which was pumping 'YMCA'. Amazing. And then I finally worked out that the street my hostel was on went underneath the road I was looking for a right turn. It was more of a right turn and jump. When I arrived the man at the desk knew me by name. Crazy. I went to my room and after making beds and rifling through bags I was pretty much asleep instantaneously. Man it was so hot, the air conditioning was on and at about 7am I woke up freezing. It was so odd. I had to put on a hoody while sleeping.
There was no window, so I slept in quite a bit, had a shower and then wandered about the streets of Sorrento.
Everything that is an Italian stereotype is true. It's insane. Scooters everywhere.
and tiny tiny streets with cars driving up them regardless of people. It's really crazy.
And a lot of Jesus. :)
After wandering for a bit I headed down to the shore and paddled around in the Mediterranean sea. Amazing.
On my journey I found an amazing cat, which spoke to me in Italian. I swear it did. You have to listen to the little bits the cat actually says and not me... its high pitched and slow... Very Italian sounding. Well to me anyway. Haha.
I hoofed it back to the hostel, got changed for the wedding, then set off to the most beautiful wedding either. I swear it was amazing. So pretty. How many people are ever married with grapes growing behind them. Seriously. Amazing.
I'm so pleased I went, I would have regretted it if I didn't.
While we were waiting for Donna to arrive a man and lady walked into the cloisters and I swear I knew them from somewhere. And it turned out to be the couple I was sitting next to on the plane. SERIOUSLY. And then Alexis and her friend Alexis showed up and it WAS the girl I had seen at the airport. So the majority of the non-family guests were all on the same plane from London to Naples. How crazy is that? Haha.
Amazing.
Wedding feet.
There was dinner, there was drinks, there was chatting, there was everything amazing. It was such a good day.
The next day, much to everyone's worry, I set off for Naples via Pompeii.
Pompeii was pretty cool, and they had a free left luggage, so I didn't have to drag my backpack all around that sweaty place. It was so hot, so dirty and so BIG.
I ended up following the Chinese people all around, I kept loosing them and walking off but I would always find them, or they me. It was amusing. I wish I could have spoken Chinese so I could hear their tour guide.
I hadn't eaten anything for breakfast and just kept drinking water. I had a packet of polos that I'd bought in London and kept chewing them. Then a familiar logo flashed before my eyes and I got really mad. WHEN DID NESTLE TAKE OVER POLO. That's why he spearmint flavour no longer has green bits in it. I was so mad. I still finished the packet though, and then raged about it for a while.
One of the Chinese tourists stopped and showed me a picture of a petrified person, and asked if I had seen those people anywhere. I told him, I was looking for the same thing.
Sure enough, when we parted ways, in different directions, and when I found the people, he was there too. I tell you, I was with them the whole way.
While I was taking pictures of Donkey and Oinker this lady walked past me and said 'Tiene un psycho.' I don't have to be able to speak Spanish to know what she saying about me. HAHA.
Pompeii bogging feet.
I then caught the train the rest of the way to Naples, and there was a guy on the train that kept looking at me strangely, but then not. It was one of those 'you're a backpacker, I'm a backpacker, we should be friends, we have stuff in common' kind of looks. It killed time watching him watch me though.
I then walked around Naples, here's a thought, when you give directions give people the real name of the street rather than the local made up name. Man I was so mad. I found the street, but it didn't match the name I had so I kept walking around and about. By the time I got to the hostel I was sweating to death. I swear, from the second I stepped off the plane until the rain came down I was just constantly sweating and too hot. Utter madness.
The hostel was really close to the train station and I seemed to have walked the most scenic route to get there. It was run by a nice man who gave me a map and a guide to the quick walking tour of Naples.
I felt like there was so much life there, so much character. After being in tourist spots this felt like home. It was amazing. I loved it.
The hostel man also told me where to go for pizza, and I tell you, I have been spoiled, never again will I ever taste pizza like that. Not unless I go back to Naples. I swear it was the best thing I've ever had.
And it was all wood burning fire cooked by this man. He was so amazing.
After filling myself, I wandered around the streets. There was a lot of people begging for money, and a lot of people performing. I met this man who clocked me for British as soon as I stood next to him. I think it was because I was so pale.
I ended up at mass, I sat in real catholic Italian mass for about 15 minutes before going back out onto the streets. I think the secret is to not behave or act like a victim, not to stare too much at people, and pretty much use common sense, it's like being in Glasgow. Seriously.
I was walking down a main shopping street and I was so impressed that there were no major chain stores or anything. It felt so nice. I saw 0 starbucks'. I tried to communicate with a lady asking me about donkey and oinker. Spanish and English were no good. All I was looking for was the word art. But I couldn't explain it.
I wandered further down the street and these two men spoke to me for about 10 minutes. The one on the left spoke english and Italian, the one on the right spoke Italian and Spanish. So I spoke to the left one in English, The right one in Spanish and they spoke Italian to each other. It was one of the greatest things I've ever done in my life. I loved it. And I even got to say the words 'El Policia' to the Spanish speaker, because I was talking about the left guy who was a service guard or something. It was amazing haha. Just like Ben Stiller in Anchorman.
Feral Dog.
This was the outside of the pizza place I was at earlier. It was totally full when it got later. Amazing.
But I was going for Gelato.
The dark alley.
When I was leaving a Japanese girl called Masami asked if we could travel to Rome together. I said I would meet her at the train station and that I wanted to wander through the market outside. While wandering through the stolen and fake trainers and bags and people heckling me to buy their things and me telling them I had shoes and I didn't need any, there was an eruption of panicked chatter. One word repeated over and over echoing down the market. Then every dodgy person grabbed their goods and started running. They had everything in/on an easily liftable bag or table. They just started running, and then seconds later a cop car drove down the market. It was crazy. Once the cops had left all the men came back.
It was a crazy market and I couldn't resist whipping out the SLR to try and photograph it. Idiotic move.
Just as the market had erupted in chatter before, it did again, but this time to the word photographia. Now, whether they thought I was the fraud police, or whether they wanted my camera, I don't know. Needless to say, after two shots, I quickly exited.
I met Masami at the train station, and we travelled to Roma. After a 20 minute hunt for the tourist information place, we went to my hostel which was crazy, and filled with European boys half-naked in the bathroom. Shared multi cubicle bathroom? It was weird. Very weird.
I changed my shoes and set about Rome. First to the colosseum, which was large, interesting, and old.
I did seem more enthralled with my M&Ms though. The M&Ms I had to buy to get changed of a 10 Euro because the shop man refused to sell me a twix for change, and before that I had to get a 10 Euro from the bank because the machine in the station wouldn't take a card for a 4 Euro 24 hour ticket. I just didn't understand. And I couldn't locate my change purse. I decided I'd left it in the hostel. I still haven't found it, so either I was pick pocketed in Naples, which is unlikely, or I left it in the hostel in Naples. Meh.
It was a rigmarole trying to get the ticket nonetheless. When I finally got it I went to the colosseum. Then to the Vatican, and then to the Trevi fountain when it was just getting dark.
The Vatican was ace. Although it was totally the wrong religion, it was still interesting and Jesus Christ was on top of it, right above where the pope gives his wee talks.
Jesus Christ IS on top of that building, with his twelve disciples.
The inside of the Vatican.
The outside of the Vatican. (This is where I was being blasphemous.)
This shop was amazing, it was filled with Baby Jesus'. I'll let me tell you though in the video.
I then went over to the Trevi fountain and found this man:
on the way. I love that he is using a shoe on his hand. That's innovation.
The fountain was swarming with people, it was pretty and all but I was Hunger-yyy. So I started wandering the streets looking for eats. I knew that if I stayed near the fountain I would be charged a fortune for Western Italian food, and I was dying for some pasta. I've never been able to have pasta that topped the stuff I had in Little Italy in New York in 2006. So i was looking and trying.
I finally settled on a restaurant because 1. I was weary, 2. The man at the door told me what the best thing on the menu was, 3. He didn't lie.
I sat outside and they sat me next to a table with three people at it, but I was slightly outside the canopy. There was thunder and lightening and then it started to spit... the waiter told me that it was fine and there would be no more than that. As a precaution the three Americans at the table next to me invited me to sit in with them. I was pleased to, and moment later the heavens opened and the sea poured out of the sky. It was mad. The whole right side of me was wet from the constant splashing of water.
The three people were so interesting though. They were from the university of Tennessee and they were there for a diabetes conference. I was telling them all about me, my life, my research etc etc and they were discussing mormonism with me and how one of the guys they work with is a member and they used to work with another guy who moved to Idaho so his children would marry members. It was brilliant, and there was never any awkward silences, and the pasta was incredible. IN CRED IBLE. And then I ordered hot chocolate. The air was warm, the rain cooling and hot chocolate was a perfect weight, temperature and flavour that just made the moment I drank/ate it the best of my life. I swear.
One of the Americans walked me back to the Metro station because he was going the same way, we ran through the streets of Rome soaking wet with the cities finest entrepreneurs selling us umbrellas that they must have had in reserve at home waiting for the rain to pour. Amazing.
I think I can honestly say that I will never run through rome again soaked to the skin, with a university lecturer from American that I met 2 hours before. It was brilliant.
We parted ways at the Termini station and wished each other those fake pleasantries for future travelling etc etc.
I headed back to the hostel and almost died I was so tired.
Masami had spent the day getting her plans together for the future days. She is my utter hero. She's 34, she was an office worker, and one day she quit and she's been travelling since May with no real time of when she's going home. Possible October, possibly not. She's been to Cambodia, Thailand, India, England, and now Italy. I'm not sure where else in Europe she'd been but I'm sure she had been other places too. She is my utter hero.
I met a tonne of solo backpackers. People that would just quit and travel, Australians and Americans mostly. It inspires me to do it. The leaving would be the hardest, but once I was on the road, I would be fine, I think. Amazing.
While I was brushing my teeth that night I stood at the open window which opened onto a bit of a balcony. I stood there and watched the rain trickle down, and I watched the beginning of 'Snatch' on a TV through another open window, and I watched another person hang their clothes in their house. It's moments like that, that make my life I think. When things are so peaceful and the world is just getting on with it. I think it's beautiful.
While I was away, the entire time I was worried that I might have been talking in my sleep. On the fourth night in Rome I woke myself up about 6am when I was trying to say some kind of long sentence, what I remember saying was something like 'well, I don't think that's very nice at all, you... '
I can't remember how it was going to end though. But I woke up and got really embarrassed haha. But then I got over it and went back to sleep.
When I woke up for real for real Masami and I got ready and left together, and I decided that I had six hours so I could see a couple of things and get another hot chocolate a pizza then hit the road for the plane station.
My left foot hurt a little, but I thought nothing of it, Masami and I parted ways and I headed towards the Trevi fountain again to see the Pantheon.
As I was walking off the metro my foot started to agonise. It felt like nerves were catching in the bone. It was the sorest pain. What took me 5 minutes to walk the night before took me about 20 because the pain was so much and it kept increasing.
I ate some random pastries outside the Trevi Fountain where I chatted to a man from Holland. And then continued my walk to the Pantheon via pharmacies and sports shops. Finally I found some kind of bandage for my foot, which I put on outside a church that someone was getting married in. I'm lovely.
My foot was lovelier. Haha.
I ambled my way to the Pantheon where this amazing video was filmed.
I then thought of trying to go to the park near the colosseum, but by the time I got back to the metro there was only really time to go back to the hostel, eat some pizza and catch the bus. While eating pizza I happened to chat to two Australians, again solo travellers that had found each other, one was hanging about until he went to Johannesburg, the other was off to work in the UK for 1 - 2 years. Either London or Glasgow. He was nice, I wish I had been a true Scot and given him contact details in case he was up this way. I suck. I never even got his name. I think that's the beauty of backpacking though. People start to get realistic. They realise that they can't keep in touch with everyone, so they enjoy each other's company for what it is, a few brief hours, one night, and then just keep the memories. No complication, its like the unwritten rule of backpacking. It's just like wee John told me, It's easier to get from A to B if you make friends along the way. That drunk man knew his stuff.
I then got myself tipsy in the airport on a liqueur. AND if you thought Prestwick was bad, try flying out of Ciampino. It was horrid. After getting tipsy, the plane being delayed, and the travel pills kicking in, I was almost unconscious in the airport.
I finished reading the Catcher in the Rye on the train to central, where I had my mum come pick me up because I was in so much foot pain agony.
I even met another solo traveller on the train to Central and he had a strange accent, but he was actually English, living in Inverness, and was in Rome for the diabetes conference too... AND I kid you not, he said the reason he had a strange accent was because he had been in Italy for those few days and he picked up the accent. OH SHUT UP. No one picks up an accent that quickly...
but apparently he does.
Thursday, 21 August 2008
All I do Is Count.
Quote of the day 'If Michael Phelps was made for swimming, he would have a fin, a tail and some gills. That's why a Shark is still faster.'
Followed by:
'12,000 calories a day, I know hundreds of teenagers on that diet and they're not winning olympic Gold's.'
'But their diet is not plankton.'
I went swimming this afternoon. I got in the pool sometime around 13:15/13:20. I tried to go swimming yesterday but due to 'industrial action' the pool was shut... Curse you.
I then went to Asda in my swimming suit to get cat food. I was indeed wearing my swimming suit to the pool, granted I was doused with my own 'street' clothing over the chlorine smelling lycra. The one rule, when wearing your swimsuit to the pool is: always bring underwear. I remembered yesterday. Today I forgot. This is the second time I've had to go home commando... just as well I was wearing my jeans with all the holes in them too with the hole in the butt of them. Oh yes, I am good. Air high five to myself.
So the session today was quite historic. I usually swim in blocks of 200m but I decided to swim 400m and see what happened.
Well, what happened was when I got to 10 lengths I decided I wanted to try and do 500m or 20 lengths.
While getting to that point that I remembered Justin once telling me about a girl who just got in the pool and swam (or swum if you're stephenie meyer) 1000m (40 lengths) in one go. So then I toyed with the idea of doing 40 and kept going.
When I got to 40, I remembered my wee brother saying yesterday that he couldn't swim 50 lengths in a row and I told him I couldn't either or rather didn't. So then I wondered if I could do 50, so I kept going. Then when I was approaching the 50 I was trying to remember how far a mile was and I think it's 64, so I decided to finish the mile and I kept going.
Then I worked out how many meters that was and it was 1600m so then I figured I could just finish the 2000m because it was only 16 more lengths.
And I kept going. I stopped at 80.
80 lengths with no stopping. I just kept going. I was also wearing my paddles so I was gliding nicely. 80 lengths though, 2000m. That's what I usually aim for in an entire session and I just did it. And I didn't even feel tired. I hit Euphoria 3 times and then came back down, but I kept going. The entire time all I did was count, one two breathree. Which then turned into the number of the length broken into three syllables, so it would have been seven-ty-six(breath).
Tonnes of numbers.
The unfortunancey of being female though is that although I am counting breaths, and counting lengths, and working out how many meters that is, and thinking about swimming the channel, and thinking about flippers, and thinking about swimming in the sea, I can still think of a million other things, like who i need to send emails to, what I might say in them, where I should apply for work, d-schools, b-schools, Stanford (again), what was wrong with my application to stanford, how I can make it better for next year, why italy hasn't contacted me yet, wondering if they are just waiting until I am too old (two weeks tomorrow), whether I should go to Manchester convention or not, whether I should go to Donna's wedding or not, how I'm going to fit in getting the Skill's mill's birthday present made and to her, what I'm going to give my sister for her birthday on the same day, how I could own a house with a 25m pool in the basement (jaxx)... and the list goes on.
I pretty much hate that I can't just swim and blow my brains out swimming, my mind is still other places and I can still swim and breath. I'm even having to concentrate on breathing and still, no escape from the hyper active cavern that is my brain. meh.
Okay, the Official Stats. And these make up for the last week I missed because I was watching the X-files and the weeks before that when I was just slacking.
200m Front Crawl
200m Breast Stroke
200m Front Crawl Legs only
100m Breast Stroke Legs only
100m butterfly Legs only
100m backstroke legs only
25m butterfly legs
25m backstroke legs
25m breastroke legs
25m front crawl legs
100m IM (25m Back, 25m Butterfly - one armed, 25m breast stroke, 25m front crawl)
2000m Front Crawl with Paddles
200m Front Crawl
200m Front Crawl
25m Front Crawl Legs
25m Breast Stroke Legs
50m Breast stroke
50m breast stroke with paddles
50m swim down
Total: 3700m or 148 lengths
I totally thought it was 150, the calculator never lies. Doh. Two more and it would have been 150.
I'm totally shattered now. I shouldn't really push myself like that, meh. It felt amazing at the time.
Runner's High, or what I mean when I say Euphoria.
I've not been boarding this week, gutted, I've not been to the cinema either. Although I did watch In her Shoes on Film Four on Monday or Tuesday night. Cameron Diaz is the pinnacle of perfection. Has she actually been in any bad movies?
I think I need some Chai Tea.
Cameron Diaz deserves her own blog. Fact. Hang on.
Followed by:
'12,000 calories a day, I know hundreds of teenagers on that diet and they're not winning olympic Gold's.'
'But their diet is not plankton.'
I went swimming this afternoon. I got in the pool sometime around 13:15/13:20. I tried to go swimming yesterday but due to 'industrial action' the pool was shut... Curse you.
I then went to Asda in my swimming suit to get cat food. I was indeed wearing my swimming suit to the pool, granted I was doused with my own 'street' clothing over the chlorine smelling lycra. The one rule, when wearing your swimsuit to the pool is: always bring underwear. I remembered yesterday. Today I forgot. This is the second time I've had to go home commando... just as well I was wearing my jeans with all the holes in them too with the hole in the butt of them. Oh yes, I am good. Air high five to myself.
So the session today was quite historic. I usually swim in blocks of 200m but I decided to swim 400m and see what happened.
Well, what happened was when I got to 10 lengths I decided I wanted to try and do 500m or 20 lengths.
While getting to that point that I remembered Justin once telling me about a girl who just got in the pool and swam (or swum if you're stephenie meyer) 1000m (40 lengths) in one go. So then I toyed with the idea of doing 40 and kept going.
When I got to 40, I remembered my wee brother saying yesterday that he couldn't swim 50 lengths in a row and I told him I couldn't either or rather didn't. So then I wondered if I could do 50, so I kept going. Then when I was approaching the 50 I was trying to remember how far a mile was and I think it's 64, so I decided to finish the mile and I kept going.
Then I worked out how many meters that was and it was 1600m so then I figured I could just finish the 2000m because it was only 16 more lengths.
And I kept going. I stopped at 80.
80 lengths with no stopping. I just kept going. I was also wearing my paddles so I was gliding nicely. 80 lengths though, 2000m. That's what I usually aim for in an entire session and I just did it. And I didn't even feel tired. I hit Euphoria 3 times and then came back down, but I kept going. The entire time all I did was count, one two breathree. Which then turned into the number of the length broken into three syllables, so it would have been seven-ty-six(breath).
Tonnes of numbers.
The unfortunancey of being female though is that although I am counting breaths, and counting lengths, and working out how many meters that is, and thinking about swimming the channel, and thinking about flippers, and thinking about swimming in the sea, I can still think of a million other things, like who i need to send emails to, what I might say in them, where I should apply for work, d-schools, b-schools, Stanford (again), what was wrong with my application to stanford, how I can make it better for next year, why italy hasn't contacted me yet, wondering if they are just waiting until I am too old (two weeks tomorrow), whether I should go to Manchester convention or not, whether I should go to Donna's wedding or not, how I'm going to fit in getting the Skill's mill's birthday present made and to her, what I'm going to give my sister for her birthday on the same day, how I could own a house with a 25m pool in the basement (jaxx)... and the list goes on.
I pretty much hate that I can't just swim and blow my brains out swimming, my mind is still other places and I can still swim and breath. I'm even having to concentrate on breathing and still, no escape from the hyper active cavern that is my brain. meh.
Okay, the Official Stats. And these make up for the last week I missed because I was watching the X-files and the weeks before that when I was just slacking.
200m Front Crawl
200m Breast Stroke
200m Front Crawl Legs only
100m Breast Stroke Legs only
100m butterfly Legs only
100m backstroke legs only
25m butterfly legs
25m backstroke legs
25m breastroke legs
25m front crawl legs
100m IM (25m Back, 25m Butterfly - one armed, 25m breast stroke, 25m front crawl)
2000m Front Crawl with Paddles
200m Front Crawl
200m Front Crawl
25m Front Crawl Legs
25m Breast Stroke Legs
50m Breast stroke
50m breast stroke with paddles
50m swim down
Total: 3700m or 148 lengths
I totally thought it was 150, the calculator never lies. Doh. Two more and it would have been 150.
I'm totally shattered now. I shouldn't really push myself like that, meh. It felt amazing at the time.
Runner's High, or what I mean when I say Euphoria.
I've not been boarding this week, gutted, I've not been to the cinema either. Although I did watch In her Shoes on Film Four on Monday or Tuesday night. Cameron Diaz is the pinnacle of perfection. Has she actually been in any bad movies?
I think I need some Chai Tea.
Cameron Diaz deserves her own blog. Fact. Hang on.
Tuesday, 12 August 2008
Childhood Dreams; or, When I Used To Want To Be A Hollywood, time travelling Ninja Cat.
After watching that Randy Pausch lecture the other day I've started wondering what on earth my childhood dreams were.
The more you grow up the more you realise the harshness and the non-fiction version of the world, and you suddently realise that your childhood dreams are either a) not plausible b) just not socially acceptable or c) satanic.
(Saying the word plausible reminds me of a short conversation I had in Utah about me wanting to be married in the San Diego temple. This was a childhood dream actually, and the person I was talking to told me that it was possible and plausible if I was to marry someone from California... I was royally pissed off at that point because it felt like I was being shoo'd and told to go chase Californians... pah ha. My anger management is getting better as I start to rebuild my defenses and my wall.)
So here they are, things that during my childhood I wanted to be or wanted to do.
1. A writer. I used to write fiction stories all the time. I loved it. All about futuristic video games sucking people in, or about foxes. I used to write in a style similar to Wes Anderson (TAKE THAT CHRIS) but he was better than me it is fact. I say was, because now I am just amazing and Wes Anderson will one day be stealing ideas from me.
2. Architect, Lawyer, Airhostess.
3. Animator working for Disney. This is a big one. I went to art school and Dundee to do animation. Through divine intervention I ended up doing graphic design. I'm still waiting to find out what great purpose that has to serve. That and my orange converse. What are they for?
I still want to work for Disney, but I hate them at the same time. See option c of things that can happen to your childhood dreams.
4. An artist, an actress, a movie director, a filmaker.
5. A musician. I've always wanted to be in a band, and i've ALWAYS since the age of 5/6 wanted to play the drums. That should be something I definitely have to fulfill. I've wanted to play the guitar and bass too, as well as the glockenspiel, like Johnny Greenwood from radiohead.
6. A model, a dancer.
7. I've wanted to live in New York, and California.
8. An Olympic Swimmer. I still wish this.
9. I wanted to be Michael J Fox.
10. I wanted to be a goonie.
11. An advertiser.
12. A super awesome wife with mini Vikki spawn that are my best friends.
13. A superhero
14. Strong.
15. A ninja figher, a spy, a sneaky sneakerton.
16. A hat wearer.
17. A cook. A Baker.
18. A Bartender like in Cocktail, so someone can come up to me one day and say 'Bartender, you know how to make a red eye.'
19. I wanted to marry and kiss Tom Cruise and ride on the back of his motorbike.
20. A cat.
There's a lot of random ones.
I might now pick out the best and re-occuring ones.
1. Work for Disney
2. Live in New York and LA
3. Be Michael J. Fox in Back to the Future
4. Be an Olympic Swimmer
5. Be in a super douper rock band (as either the guitarist, the lead singer, the drummer etc)
6. An advertiser
7. A Goonie
8. A superhero (ninja warrior)
9. A Writer
10. An artist
11. Film maker.
Pretty much, I want to be the epitome of popular culture. I want to be Keanu Reeves. PAH HA. Not really, I want to be Michael J Fox.
On top of all that one of my most recent goals is to be on Takeshi's castle or another asian equivalent.
I also just want to travel.
I think the common denomonator in all my childhood dreams was excitement. I wanted another life, a more exciting life, one with crazy goonie adventures and time travel and tom cruise and fame and MC Hammer.
Do do do do, do do do can't touch this. Don't stop... MILLER TIME.
Here's one more thought.
Do you ever sing along with the hoover? Because I for one do, and wait and listen for it to resonate. I love that sound. Singing in harmony with the hoover.
The more you grow up the more you realise the harshness and the non-fiction version of the world, and you suddently realise that your childhood dreams are either a) not plausible b) just not socially acceptable or c) satanic.
(Saying the word plausible reminds me of a short conversation I had in Utah about me wanting to be married in the San Diego temple. This was a childhood dream actually, and the person I was talking to told me that it was possible and plausible if I was to marry someone from California... I was royally pissed off at that point because it felt like I was being shoo'd and told to go chase Californians... pah ha. My anger management is getting better as I start to rebuild my defenses and my wall.)
So here they are, things that during my childhood I wanted to be or wanted to do.
1. A writer. I used to write fiction stories all the time. I loved it. All about futuristic video games sucking people in, or about foxes. I used to write in a style similar to Wes Anderson (TAKE THAT CHRIS) but he was better than me it is fact. I say was, because now I am just amazing and Wes Anderson will one day be stealing ideas from me.
2. Architect, Lawyer, Airhostess.
3. Animator working for Disney. This is a big one. I went to art school and Dundee to do animation. Through divine intervention I ended up doing graphic design. I'm still waiting to find out what great purpose that has to serve. That and my orange converse. What are they for?
I still want to work for Disney, but I hate them at the same time. See option c of things that can happen to your childhood dreams.
4. An artist, an actress, a movie director, a filmaker.
5. A musician. I've always wanted to be in a band, and i've ALWAYS since the age of 5/6 wanted to play the drums. That should be something I definitely have to fulfill. I've wanted to play the guitar and bass too, as well as the glockenspiel, like Johnny Greenwood from radiohead.
6. A model, a dancer.
7. I've wanted to live in New York, and California.
8. An Olympic Swimmer. I still wish this.
9. I wanted to be Michael J Fox.
10. I wanted to be a goonie.
11. An advertiser.
12. A super awesome wife with mini Vikki spawn that are my best friends.
13. A superhero
14. Strong.
15. A ninja figher, a spy, a sneaky sneakerton.
16. A hat wearer.
17. A cook. A Baker.
18. A Bartender like in Cocktail, so someone can come up to me one day and say 'Bartender, you know how to make a red eye.'
19. I wanted to marry and kiss Tom Cruise and ride on the back of his motorbike.
20. A cat.
There's a lot of random ones.
I might now pick out the best and re-occuring ones.
1. Work for Disney
2. Live in New York and LA
3. Be Michael J. Fox in Back to the Future
4. Be an Olympic Swimmer
5. Be in a super douper rock band (as either the guitarist, the lead singer, the drummer etc)
6. An advertiser
7. A Goonie
8. A superhero (ninja warrior)
9. A Writer
10. An artist
11. Film maker.
Pretty much, I want to be the epitome of popular culture. I want to be Keanu Reeves. PAH HA. Not really, I want to be Michael J Fox.
On top of all that one of my most recent goals is to be on Takeshi's castle or another asian equivalent.
I also just want to travel.
I think the common denomonator in all my childhood dreams was excitement. I wanted another life, a more exciting life, one with crazy goonie adventures and time travel and tom cruise and fame and MC Hammer.
Do do do do, do do do can't touch this. Don't stop... MILLER TIME.
Here's one more thought.
Do you ever sing along with the hoover? Because I for one do, and wait and listen for it to resonate. I love that sound. Singing in harmony with the hoover.
Monday, 11 August 2008
Diane Keaton's Lips. (And Keanu's AGAIN)
... were sucking face with Keanu Reeves and Jack Nicholson.
I accidently watched 'Something's Got To Give'. Not to be mistaken for the Drowning Pool song.
ONE nothing's wrong with me
TWO Nothing's wrong with me
THREE Nothing's wrong with me
FOUOUOEURLFKLDSJFAKSJKLFJAKL:SJOAAHHHHHHHH
Let the bodies hit the floo'
Anyway.
Saturday night, late, I as starting my hobby of watching the ends of movies, and happened upon something's got to give. I thought it was in its last hour, but thanks to STV and their old fashioned ways it was scheduled for an hour before the news then another hour after the news at 10.
Hmmm.
So I ended up watching 80% of it.
I also realised that I am the fictional character of a mid-50s woman.
Diane Keaton's character was so me, it was unbelievable.
Although I have not fallen in love with Jack Nicholson, I am not divorced, and I am most definitely not dating Keanu Reeves.
If any of these three were the case I can assure you my blogs might be a little bit more interesting, or they might not exist at all. Especially if I was dating Keanu Reeves because not only would I be molesting him (Mormon style) but I would also be time travelling in a phone box with him while Rufus played guitar; I would be travelling through the matrix and learning kung fu; I would be driving a bus at 50mph; I would be communicating through a mail box two years in the future; I would be visiting him at his dentist surgery while he endeavoured to be a hippy; I would be engaged to him under false pretences so my illegitimate child had a father for my parents' benefit; I would be his drug dealer and everything would actually be partially animated; hell, I might even be an angsty Teen with an undercut who married him while he decided to be a dare devil.
My point being: Keanu Reeves has one of the most eclectic film repetoirs known to man. Someone should call him on it. It's a bit crazy. He gets around.
The gist is, however, I am Diane Keaton. And I wonder if I will end up with Jack Nicholson.
I accidently watched 'Something's Got To Give'. Not to be mistaken for the Drowning Pool song.
ONE nothing's wrong with me
TWO Nothing's wrong with me
THREE Nothing's wrong with me
FOUOUOEURLFKLDSJFAKSJKLFJAKL:SJOAAHHHHHHHH
Let the bodies hit the floo'
Anyway.
Saturday night, late, I as starting my hobby of watching the ends of movies, and happened upon something's got to give. I thought it was in its last hour, but thanks to STV and their old fashioned ways it was scheduled for an hour before the news then another hour after the news at 10.
Hmmm.
So I ended up watching 80% of it.
I also realised that I am the fictional character of a mid-50s woman.
Diane Keaton's character was so me, it was unbelievable.
Although I have not fallen in love with Jack Nicholson, I am not divorced, and I am most definitely not dating Keanu Reeves.
If any of these three were the case I can assure you my blogs might be a little bit more interesting, or they might not exist at all. Especially if I was dating Keanu Reeves because not only would I be molesting him (Mormon style) but I would also be time travelling in a phone box with him while Rufus played guitar; I would be travelling through the matrix and learning kung fu; I would be driving a bus at 50mph; I would be communicating through a mail box two years in the future; I would be visiting him at his dentist surgery while he endeavoured to be a hippy; I would be engaged to him under false pretences so my illegitimate child had a father for my parents' benefit; I would be his drug dealer and everything would actually be partially animated; hell, I might even be an angsty Teen with an undercut who married him while he decided to be a dare devil.
My point being: Keanu Reeves has one of the most eclectic film repetoirs known to man. Someone should call him on it. It's a bit crazy. He gets around.
The gist is, however, I am Diane Keaton. And I wonder if I will end up with Jack Nicholson.
Friday, 8 August 2008
Erased my Life.
Have you ever watched 6 years of your life flash before your eyes in a second?
I felt like I was having a near death experience or something.
Upgrading the mac (yes I am still talking about the mac) meant that iPhoto is a little more upgraded too, which means I can now link pictures to my external hard drive and still see them in iPhoto. Like what I do with my iTunes.
Anyway.
I was uploading the pictures and there were about 13,000 of them (and that's not them all) and they just flickered on past my face. It was strange. So quickly as wel. And of course they were animated. I love still frame animation.
I then sat and watched my life be erased from the hard drive of old mac. It was odd. Again, over in seconds.
The other day, when I was in town buying breaking dawn, i parked close to George Square and Borders. When I came back to my car I just leaped in (after punching it by accident and jumping up and down in pain) and then while driving I saw that someone had left a card under the windscreen wiper (which was on, because it's Glasgow and it's summer time).
So it sa there for a few days. I then looked at it. This is what it said
I wondered if they targetted my car because it is a Ford Ka. Hmmm, and it was parked infront of the prettiest Mercedes I've seen in a long long time. I think I actually gawked at it as I walked past it. I love my ka though. Love it. Love.
Hopefully I'll have something interesting to blog about soon.
Oh. So, last week when I was going a bit cray in work my blood pressure was 98 Beats a Minute.
This meant nothing to me because I don't know what my regular resting heart beat is. So I took it the next morning to see the difference and it was 72 Beats a Minute.
Out of genuine curiosity I took my heart rate on Monday at work and it was down in the 50s I think I think 57.
I remember reading that the average rate should be between 70-90 and that people who do endurance sports probably sit lower than 70.
Swimming is technically endurance. Hmmm.
I'm going to take it right now.
Right now it's sitting at 60-64.
Yeah, my heart rate was through the roof last week. Mental.
I felt like I was having a near death experience or something.
Upgrading the mac (yes I am still talking about the mac) meant that iPhoto is a little more upgraded too, which means I can now link pictures to my external hard drive and still see them in iPhoto. Like what I do with my iTunes.
Anyway.
I was uploading the pictures and there were about 13,000 of them (and that's not them all) and they just flickered on past my face. It was strange. So quickly as wel. And of course they were animated. I love still frame animation.
I then sat and watched my life be erased from the hard drive of old mac. It was odd. Again, over in seconds.
The other day, when I was in town buying breaking dawn, i parked close to George Square and Borders. When I came back to my car I just leaped in (after punching it by accident and jumping up and down in pain) and then while driving I saw that someone had left a card under the windscreen wiper (which was on, because it's Glasgow and it's summer time).
So it sa there for a few days. I then looked at it. This is what it said
I wondered if they targetted my car because it is a Ford Ka. Hmmm, and it was parked infront of the prettiest Mercedes I've seen in a long long time. I think I actually gawked at it as I walked past it. I love my ka though. Love it. Love.
Hopefully I'll have something interesting to blog about soon.
Oh. So, last week when I was going a bit cray in work my blood pressure was 98 Beats a Minute.
This meant nothing to me because I don't know what my regular resting heart beat is. So I took it the next morning to see the difference and it was 72 Beats a Minute.
Out of genuine curiosity I took my heart rate on Monday at work and it was down in the 50s I think I think 57.
I remember reading that the average rate should be between 70-90 and that people who do endurance sports probably sit lower than 70.
Swimming is technically endurance. Hmmm.
I'm going to take it right now.
Right now it's sitting at 60-64.
Yeah, my heart rate was through the roof last week. Mental.
Wednesday, 6 August 2008
That is for Sale. Please Alphabetise it.
I found myself at a bit of an odd end on Monday at work, there wasn't any work for me to do, so I started sifting through old emails. This was a risky business, because not only was I reading the emails I once received under better circumstance and, what almost feels like, another life, I was reading my responses and emails too. This lead me to realise that
a) Everything changes
b) I come across as quite boring in emails
c) I try too hard
d) I hate that things change that I don't want to change
e) There must be a time that things won't change
f) I worry too much
g) when the stakes (or steaks) are too high (and out of reach on the top shelf) I don't gamble and, again, worry too much
h) I am mourning the loss of a time
i) My thoughts are my own worst enemy
j) I have too much fear (again, only when the stakes are too high. ie. when i care too much)
k) I was always most attractive when I couldn't care less
kk)
l) I seem to just be going through the motions
m) I really like playing the violin
n) I finally got Breaking Dawn – I'm going to read more of it when I finish writing this. I read the first couple of chapters in Starbucks (I miss Toni and the Starbucks banter) and I was almost squealing when Bella walked down the aisle.
o) I am actually a girl and a bit of a romantic (in more of a traditional sentimental sense)
p) I remember too many things that don't seem to matter to any one else
q) I've never fought before, perhaps it's time to do so.
r) I went climbing the other day and aggrivated my fear of heights, hurt all of my muscles but it felt good, I achieved something I would never have done before. From this I learned that I don't participate in things, or do many things at all incase I am terrible at them and people will think lesser of me. This, of course, is a stupid thought, but I have realised this is how my brain thinks. I hold myself back for fear of failing.
s) I fail at a lot of things, I am not good at everything, I am not good at many things, that's why there is trying, and failing and picking one's self back up again, and doing it again. This is why the phrase 'practice makes perfect' exists.
t) I am not exempt
u) I am not an emotion superhero [although if you see an emotional superhero send him my way, he'll make me his he'll make me his all his – my knight in shining armour coming to my emotional rescue (that's one for the rolling stones fans)]
v) Kick ass awesome letter.
w) I do not work well under pressure, I stress too much, and I hate living by a time table. (I knew this from the last time I was working full time, Rufus had to remind me that we had both learned this about myself two years ago. After this realisation it was decided that I shouldn't work Monday to Friday 9:30/10am-6pm any more.
x) I have some really good friends. Some of whom I have never met and yet I spend more time with them than some of the people that I can physically hug touch and drink hot chocolate with.
y) I am not infallable. I am breakable. I am not perfect. I can aim to be perfect. But no one expects me to be perfect. I need to ask for help. I need to stop being so prideful. If I don't stop being prideful I will forget how to have fun. I need to take my own advice. I need to remember everything I've learned in my life so far and continue to use it. Gems like: There are always two choices; make the situation awkward or not, go to America or not, fight or not, live or not, be confident or not, push yourself or not. ALWAYS a choice.
z) Zero loves me, almost as much as Jesus loves me.
This list wasn't all completely compiled from reading those emails I was reading, but the first couple were. The rest are things i've been thinking about since I had to restart on Thursday evening.
I'm still re-booting though. Hugs welcome :)
I am such an iGeek dot com.
iVikki. haha.
My phone is breaking again, and I said that the next time it broke I would get an iPhone. I don't want an iPhone though. I want my gold phone that goes shhhhhwffff shhhhwfffff. So I might just get it fixed... again.
I think the transfer from old mac to new mac is complete. Tomorrow it will be a case of wiping the files, giving it a good background and maybe reinstalling leopard.
Then it will be on ebay.
While clearing out the files I kept finding traces of Nick, the previous owner. I then found out that Nick's surnmae is Brett. Nick (bloody) Brett.
Talk about a theme dot com.
Brekk the external hard drive was named after Brett and based on the ck/kk theme of naming. Vikki, Vik, Nick, Brekk and there we have it Nick Brett. It freaked me out almost as much as Brett Street.
It's not even a British name. That I know of.
Zero's here, she says it's bed time. She's pawing me.
Remember when I fell down the stairs in Queen Street and met John that peed himself. Well that bruise is STILL on my foot, and it still hurts. I think I broke my self, but because I'm a superhero I can live through the pain. I mean, I can climb walls now, while Peter Couper hoists me on a large rope. :)
The other day I was checking out the blow's website and found out there's a song I had never heard before, then I realised there was a whole album of theirs that I had never heard before.
I then fell in love with the blow all over again, not that I fell out of love with them, but it was just reconfirmed.
There's a partial cover of Sting's Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic. :)
I want someone to write a song like that about me one day.
I have a plan, for my own album, based on hearing the sting song, hearing a song by Irene that sounded like a U2 song and remembering the novelty of the Nouvelle Vague covers.
Excited.
here are some kick ass awesome lyrics that prove why the blow are so amazing:
(the internet is currently broken, so I'm just going to talk amongst myself until it comes back on. I've been transferring all my files from old mac to new mac, and I found some msn conversations from about a year ago. One of them was actually the last conversation I had with Ricking. I miss Rick King. There's an example of messing everything up by appearing to be mental/psychotic/stalkerish/pressure bringing. Although the story of Patrick Klassen is probably more accurate in describing my mentalness. With Ricking I don't think I was mental, I was just being me. Perhaps that is my problem. No one understands that me is normal, and that there is no pressure or mentalness because that's just how I am. However, sometimes my behaviour could be mistaken for that of a crazy person depending on how well the recipricant knows about me and knows about my general personality. I'm not mental, i'm just different. I suppose. The internet is still not back. I'm going to go kick it in the face....
So, I remember getting an email from Eilidh once that told me and made my understand what kind of person I am. She said that she and I were similar because we are
1. Over Keen
which makes us
2. Over Care
about the person, friend or otherwise, which leads us to
3. Over Share
possessions, stories, life, openness.
Now, you can ask many people and they will probably tell you that I am not that much of an 'open' person. I just don't share too many thoughts, feelings and emotions. Although I am getting better I still tend to play everything down a little bit. But Eilidh was write, is write. Whenever I get excited about a friend or a new play toy I get over excited. That's what I do. It's like picking up New Mac (pneumatic drill = newmacic drill) I start singing and dancing and bursting with excitement like no other. I then instantly over care about the person which leads me to want to include them in everything I am doing, and possibly everything I've ever done.
Does that make me psychotic? I don't think so.
Believe it or not, but I am having issues just now with thinking that boys think I'm a psycho. That's the only explanation i've come up with so far. That's how I must be perceived. When I like someone, I go overboard. How can that be wrong though? Is that not better than playing games and causing mental torture on someone? I hate being mentally tortured, I do it to myself all the time. So why on earth would I EVER want to do it to someone else? And I would never want to do it to someone I cared for, just in the name of power. This is my failing though, it seems, I don't participate in the chase anymore. Because it's all nonsense. Non-sense.
I'm starting a new honesty chapter. I've been getting the guts to email people from over the years and apologising if I ever did play games with them, because it sucks.
The internet still isn't working. I want to share the Blow Lyrics with you before I go.
I am so tired.
I love chamomile tea, on a breezey summer night (on hammer hill). I'm going to listen to And I remember every kiss. I love Jens Lekman.
So here it is, the reason the blow are good (is good) and the other reason I want to go to Portland and hang out with her.
Hey Boy.
Hey Boy
Why you didn't call me?
I waited for days
I can't believe you didn't call
Hey Boy
Why you didn't call me?
I waited for days
I can't believe you didn't call
A. You're gay
B. You've got a girlfriend
C. You kinda thought I came on too strong or
D. I just wasn't your thing
no ring
Hey Boy
Why you didn't call me?
I waited for days
I can't believe you didn't call
When we sat outside for an hour at the party and talked
I thought something good could be starting
It's not a lot that I want
just some talking
and really, you just injured my pride
Hey Boy
Why you didn't call me?
I waited for days
I can't believe you didn't call
Susan said that maybe you're scared
Shelly says there always is a reason
and Chris said you're probably surrounded by girls and I'm just not one of them you're needing.
Chris is probably right. But then so is Susan and Shelly. Tell me that that does not ring true to everyone's life (Thank you Dris Chaines for uploading it for me. You are the best... and for pointing out how awesome this song is).
But really, how good is the verse 'it's not a lot that i want'. I think boys think all girls are mental. I mean, we are to an extent that we think about weddings and I look up dresses online, haha. But that doesn't mean we want to marry someone after a day, or a couple of weeks. There's no need for the constant fear that we/I am filled with pressure and over eagerness. Yes it appears that I am too keen, but that's just how I opporate. I am just as scared as boys, committment and everything else as boys are of it. My track record with the males of the species isn't the best. I always bail, I always get out, and I always keep them all at arms length (should there be an apostrophe, it is the length belonging to the arm.) I am truly ranting and revealing a random piece of the puzzle to my life.
I really miss Scott. I think when my emotions caught up with me I realised that Scott is actually dead and not coming back, and that I do and will miss him. I am so good at supressing things, and sallying on like the trouper I pretend to be. Then it all comes crashing down. Welcome to the post-university blues as well, welcome to vikkiville.
I am too monogomous.
Favourite bands of 2008: Caribou, Jens Lekman, The Blow, Cocorosie. FACT. And I've seen them all within 12 months.
Cocorosie was September 2007
The blow was October 2007
Caribou was October 2007
Jens Lekman was May 2008
Thank you Glasgow/Salt Lake. Thank you life. I don't think I could ever live too far away from a major city. I love city life. I love live music. I'm going to go sing karaoke in Japan with Dean. Not Dean Martin from the Rat Pack though, although that would be awesome too, but Deanerio Vincenterio my Density.
Today has been brought to you by the letters:
I-H-A-V-E-W-E-T-H-A-I-R
The numbers:
breaking dawn
and the words:
Cat Food.
Today's weather was also asleep for a lot of the day. I need my rest.
Right now the weather is semi-sedated on Chamomile. What a natural herby drug. MEGA.
a) Everything changes
b) I come across as quite boring in emails
c) I try too hard
d) I hate that things change that I don't want to change
e) There must be a time that things won't change
f) I worry too much
g) when the stakes (or steaks) are too high (and out of reach on the top shelf) I don't gamble and, again, worry too much
h) I am mourning the loss of a time
i) My thoughts are my own worst enemy
j) I have too much fear (again, only when the stakes are too high. ie. when i care too much)
k) I was always most attractive when I couldn't care less
kk)
l) I seem to just be going through the motions
m) I really like playing the violin
n) I finally got Breaking Dawn – I'm going to read more of it when I finish writing this. I read the first couple of chapters in Starbucks (I miss Toni and the Starbucks banter) and I was almost squealing when Bella walked down the aisle.
o) I am actually a girl and a bit of a romantic (in more of a traditional sentimental sense)
p) I remember too many things that don't seem to matter to any one else
q) I've never fought before, perhaps it's time to do so.
r) I went climbing the other day and aggrivated my fear of heights, hurt all of my muscles but it felt good, I achieved something I would never have done before. From this I learned that I don't participate in things, or do many things at all incase I am terrible at them and people will think lesser of me. This, of course, is a stupid thought, but I have realised this is how my brain thinks. I hold myself back for fear of failing.
s) I fail at a lot of things, I am not good at everything, I am not good at many things, that's why there is trying, and failing and picking one's self back up again, and doing it again. This is why the phrase 'practice makes perfect' exists.
t) I am not exempt
u) I am not an emotion superhero [although if you see an emotional superhero send him my way, he'll make me his he'll make me his all his – my knight in shining armour coming to my emotional rescue (that's one for the rolling stones fans)]
v) Kick ass awesome letter.
w) I do not work well under pressure, I stress too much, and I hate living by a time table. (I knew this from the last time I was working full time, Rufus had to remind me that we had both learned this about myself two years ago. After this realisation it was decided that I shouldn't work Monday to Friday 9:30/10am-6pm any more.
x) I have some really good friends. Some of whom I have never met and yet I spend more time with them than some of the people that I can physically hug touch and drink hot chocolate with.
y) I am not infallable. I am breakable. I am not perfect. I can aim to be perfect. But no one expects me to be perfect. I need to ask for help. I need to stop being so prideful. If I don't stop being prideful I will forget how to have fun. I need to take my own advice. I need to remember everything I've learned in my life so far and continue to use it. Gems like: There are always two choices; make the situation awkward or not, go to America or not, fight or not, live or not, be confident or not, push yourself or not. ALWAYS a choice.
z) Zero loves me, almost as much as Jesus loves me.
This list wasn't all completely compiled from reading those emails I was reading, but the first couple were. The rest are things i've been thinking about since I had to restart on Thursday evening.
I'm still re-booting though. Hugs welcome :)
I am such an iGeek dot com.
iVikki. haha.
My phone is breaking again, and I said that the next time it broke I would get an iPhone. I don't want an iPhone though. I want my gold phone that goes shhhhhwffff shhhhwfffff. So I might just get it fixed... again.
I think the transfer from old mac to new mac is complete. Tomorrow it will be a case of wiping the files, giving it a good background and maybe reinstalling leopard.
Then it will be on ebay.
While clearing out the files I kept finding traces of Nick, the previous owner. I then found out that Nick's surnmae is Brett. Nick (bloody) Brett.
Talk about a theme dot com.
Brekk the external hard drive was named after Brett and based on the ck/kk theme of naming. Vikki, Vik, Nick, Brekk and there we have it Nick Brett. It freaked me out almost as much as Brett Street.
It's not even a British name. That I know of.
Zero's here, she says it's bed time. She's pawing me.
Remember when I fell down the stairs in Queen Street and met John that peed himself. Well that bruise is STILL on my foot, and it still hurts. I think I broke my self, but because I'm a superhero I can live through the pain. I mean, I can climb walls now, while Peter Couper hoists me on a large rope. :)
The other day I was checking out the blow's website and found out there's a song I had never heard before, then I realised there was a whole album of theirs that I had never heard before.
I then fell in love with the blow all over again, not that I fell out of love with them, but it was just reconfirmed.
There's a partial cover of Sting's Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic. :)
I want someone to write a song like that about me one day.
I have a plan, for my own album, based on hearing the sting song, hearing a song by Irene that sounded like a U2 song and remembering the novelty of the Nouvelle Vague covers.
Excited.
here are some kick ass awesome lyrics that prove why the blow are so amazing:
(the internet is currently broken, so I'm just going to talk amongst myself until it comes back on. I've been transferring all my files from old mac to new mac, and I found some msn conversations from about a year ago. One of them was actually the last conversation I had with Ricking. I miss Rick King. There's an example of messing everything up by appearing to be mental/psychotic/stalkerish/pressure bringing. Although the story of Patrick Klassen is probably more accurate in describing my mentalness. With Ricking I don't think I was mental, I was just being me. Perhaps that is my problem. No one understands that me is normal, and that there is no pressure or mentalness because that's just how I am. However, sometimes my behaviour could be mistaken for that of a crazy person depending on how well the recipricant knows about me and knows about my general personality. I'm not mental, i'm just different. I suppose. The internet is still not back. I'm going to go kick it in the face....
So, I remember getting an email from Eilidh once that told me and made my understand what kind of person I am. She said that she and I were similar because we are
1. Over Keen
which makes us
2. Over Care
about the person, friend or otherwise, which leads us to
3. Over Share
possessions, stories, life, openness.
Now, you can ask many people and they will probably tell you that I am not that much of an 'open' person. I just don't share too many thoughts, feelings and emotions. Although I am getting better I still tend to play everything down a little bit. But Eilidh was write, is write. Whenever I get excited about a friend or a new play toy I get over excited. That's what I do. It's like picking up New Mac (pneumatic drill = newmacic drill) I start singing and dancing and bursting with excitement like no other. I then instantly over care about the person which leads me to want to include them in everything I am doing, and possibly everything I've ever done.
Does that make me psychotic? I don't think so.
Believe it or not, but I am having issues just now with thinking that boys think I'm a psycho. That's the only explanation i've come up with so far. That's how I must be perceived. When I like someone, I go overboard. How can that be wrong though? Is that not better than playing games and causing mental torture on someone? I hate being mentally tortured, I do it to myself all the time. So why on earth would I EVER want to do it to someone else? And I would never want to do it to someone I cared for, just in the name of power. This is my failing though, it seems, I don't participate in the chase anymore. Because it's all nonsense. Non-sense.
I'm starting a new honesty chapter. I've been getting the guts to email people from over the years and apologising if I ever did play games with them, because it sucks.
The internet still isn't working. I want to share the Blow Lyrics with you before I go.
I am so tired.
I love chamomile tea, on a breezey summer night (on hammer hill). I'm going to listen to And I remember every kiss. I love Jens Lekman.
So here it is, the reason the blow are good (is good) and the other reason I want to go to Portland and hang out with her.
Hey Boy.
Hey Boy
Why you didn't call me?
I waited for days
I can't believe you didn't call
Hey Boy
Why you didn't call me?
I waited for days
I can't believe you didn't call
A. You're gay
B. You've got a girlfriend
C. You kinda thought I came on too strong or
D. I just wasn't your thing
no ring
Hey Boy
Why you didn't call me?
I waited for days
I can't believe you didn't call
When we sat outside for an hour at the party and talked
I thought something good could be starting
It's not a lot that I want
just some talking
and really, you just injured my pride
Hey Boy
Why you didn't call me?
I waited for days
I can't believe you didn't call
Susan said that maybe you're scared
Shelly says there always is a reason
and Chris said you're probably surrounded by girls and I'm just not one of them you're needing.
Chris is probably right. But then so is Susan and Shelly. Tell me that that does not ring true to everyone's life (Thank you Dris Chaines for uploading it for me. You are the best... and for pointing out how awesome this song is).
But really, how good is the verse 'it's not a lot that i want'. I think boys think all girls are mental. I mean, we are to an extent that we think about weddings and I look up dresses online, haha. But that doesn't mean we want to marry someone after a day, or a couple of weeks. There's no need for the constant fear that we/I am filled with pressure and over eagerness. Yes it appears that I am too keen, but that's just how I opporate. I am just as scared as boys, committment and everything else as boys are of it. My track record with the males of the species isn't the best. I always bail, I always get out, and I always keep them all at arms length (should there be an apostrophe, it is the length belonging to the arm.) I am truly ranting and revealing a random piece of the puzzle to my life.
I really miss Scott. I think when my emotions caught up with me I realised that Scott is actually dead and not coming back, and that I do and will miss him. I am so good at supressing things, and sallying on like the trouper I pretend to be. Then it all comes crashing down. Welcome to the post-university blues as well, welcome to vikkiville.
I am too monogomous.
Favourite bands of 2008: Caribou, Jens Lekman, The Blow, Cocorosie. FACT. And I've seen them all within 12 months.
Cocorosie was September 2007
The blow was October 2007
Caribou was October 2007
Jens Lekman was May 2008
Thank you Glasgow/Salt Lake. Thank you life. I don't think I could ever live too far away from a major city. I love city life. I love live music. I'm going to go sing karaoke in Japan with Dean. Not Dean Martin from the Rat Pack though, although that would be awesome too, but Deanerio Vincenterio my Density.
Today has been brought to you by the letters:
I-H-A-V-E-W-E-T-H-A-I-R
The numbers:
breaking dawn
and the words:
Cat Food.
Today's weather was also asleep for a lot of the day. I need my rest.
Right now the weather is semi-sedated on Chamomile. What a natural herby drug. MEGA.
Monday, 4 August 2008
I love shoes.
Last week after church I went to the park to kill time before going to Patsy's. The only problem with going to the park after church was that I was wearing high heel shoes and my vintage awesome dress. That was no problem for me, but for everyone else they just stared.
I was stalking through the park quicker than most of the people there with their hiking boots and short shorts. And they looked at me as if I had fallen out of the 50s or something. I won't deny that I wasn't loving it and slightly amused at the looks I was getting. I was not wearing typical park attire.
I walked for about 10 minutes then sat on the grass and finished the end of eclipse. I was joking that I would read all three of the Twilight books before the fourth was released, but I managed to do it with no effort at all, with a week to spare. I've had no vampire fix for the past week though. Although tomorrow is the day, I'm so excited for lunchtime tomorrow.
The week has been a bit crazy. It's been all work and no play, and then I had a minor breakdown which made me felt quite psychotic. Although, to know that I'm being psychotic means that I'm not actually. I need to reset though, and when I reset I'm going to hit the ctrl, apple, shift and s button too. (or f. I can't actually remember.)
I'll be grand though. I just need to take more time for doing the things that I want to do with work and career etc.
Anyway, I love Macbook Pro. It makes me so happy, and I wish I worked for apple, although I would probably start resenting Apple if I worked for them.
I wish I had more shoes, I wish I actually had more occasions to wear real shoes. I always forget how much I love shoes.
I was planning on doing a total photo montage, because I've switching all the files over I've found tonnes of images that i've taken off my phone that I've never put online, but they are somewhat amusing. But It's almost 1am, and I slept the Sunday away, and I have to go to work in the morning.
Sliced dried (soft) mango.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Pasta and Cheese (with Pesto)
Rice Krispie cakes
Cheese
Travelling
Driving (while listening to amazing playlists)
Zero (the ghost cat)
Watching Back to the Future with Deanerio at the same time in different countries (but the same time zone) while on msn.
Shoes
I was stalking through the park quicker than most of the people there with their hiking boots and short shorts. And they looked at me as if I had fallen out of the 50s or something. I won't deny that I wasn't loving it and slightly amused at the looks I was getting. I was not wearing typical park attire.
I walked for about 10 minutes then sat on the grass and finished the end of eclipse. I was joking that I would read all three of the Twilight books before the fourth was released, but I managed to do it with no effort at all, with a week to spare. I've had no vampire fix for the past week though. Although tomorrow is the day, I'm so excited for lunchtime tomorrow.
The week has been a bit crazy. It's been all work and no play, and then I had a minor breakdown which made me felt quite psychotic. Although, to know that I'm being psychotic means that I'm not actually. I need to reset though, and when I reset I'm going to hit the ctrl, apple, shift and s button too. (or f. I can't actually remember.)
I'll be grand though. I just need to take more time for doing the things that I want to do with work and career etc.
Anyway, I love Macbook Pro. It makes me so happy, and I wish I worked for apple, although I would probably start resenting Apple if I worked for them.
I wish I had more shoes, I wish I actually had more occasions to wear real shoes. I always forget how much I love shoes.
I was planning on doing a total photo montage, because I've switching all the files over I've found tonnes of images that i've taken off my phone that I've never put online, but they are somewhat amusing. But It's almost 1am, and I slept the Sunday away, and I have to go to work in the morning.
Things that make me happy (dot com):
Sliced dried (soft) mango.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Pasta and Cheese (with Pesto)
Rice Krispie cakes
Cheese
Travelling
Driving (while listening to amazing playlists)
Zero (the ghost cat)
Watching Back to the Future with Deanerio at the same time in different countries (but the same time zone) while on msn.
Shoes
Thursday, 24 July 2008
Seven Point Nine Hours
It's Thursday. Which means the swimming stats will come later. However, first and foremost something amazing just happened.
I created the best playlist in the world ever. Now, I know I have claimed this in the past, but those playlists (that I usually make for other people) are the best playlists in the world that they've ever heard. This playlist is the best playlist in the world that I have ever heard. I thought that the June playlist, which was inevitably the China playlist as well, was pretty amazing, but this tops the lot.
I made a smart playlist on iTunes that gathers the top listened to 111 songs. yes I am obsessed with the 11's and the 1's.
I just finished my first ever listen through the whole thing. 7.9 hours of the most amazing music and memories ever. I am well pleased. As time progresses so will the playlist. That is the beauty of it, it will always be the best playlist in the world ever. This is a fact.
I have some amazing pictures of the past couple of days to post as well. Possibly tonight after swimming, while watching still Game perhaps :)
I've also been eating peanut butter M&Ms like they're going out of fashion, and the supply is running low. GASP.
I'll tell you me though, I made an absolutely spiffing dinner last night. AMAZING. I should screenshot the playlist, I'm that much in love with it.
My 17inch Mac Daddy Pro will be with me on Saturday. Pleased.
I also have no ceilings in the bathroom and kitchen, a possibility that I'm breating in asbestos and a bedroom and living room filled with junk from the aforementioned ceiling-less rooms. BAH. My stress levels and acid levels are beyond high. I need to get a grip of my life. Hmmm. I also need to call the docooootototor for some more prescription. The magic of the NHS. NN HHH SSS.
Also, I downloaded The Lost Boys last night because I'm far too cheap and skint to buy it, but there was no sound, so I am re-downloading it again. I got an overwhelming desire to see it because I've been reading the twilight saga. I think it's because I want the ending to be how I see it, and I'm not concerned with Bella, Jacob or Edward. What I want is for for Bella's Dad – Charlie – to make some sly comment at the end about how he always knew there were vampires and werewolves. I actually want her Mum and Dad to do that. Just like how The Lost Boys ends. I love that scene, I think it might be one of my all time favourite scenes.
I looked for it on YouTube there to no avail. When my version downloads I'll chop it and post it for you to see what I mean. It's the best part of the whole movie. Perhaps the best part of the 80s.
There's some crazy competitions just now that I keep hearing about, one is a straight out art competition, there's one that encourages people to make a movie of their home town, one to make a flag that will unite the world, and a church art competition. I want to enter them all. But I am severly lacking in time. What was it that Wee John told me, 'Is time on your side?' No it's not wee john there's far too much to do. Far too much. On top of that I still have Ross's website (if he still wants me to do it), Justin's logo, Mary's work too and now Mark's sister's poetry book. I'm happy to do them all, life just gets in the way of everything. And then I want to start my record label, publicise Bleary (I <3 Bleary... you will see how much when I post my 111 playlist haha), save the world, start one of my many books that I plan on making. Who honestly has the time. On top of all that I am actually working and paying back my debts. I don't know how normal people manage it, then all I want to do is knit, bake, and sew things. I love being me and having my strange desires but I am so busy it's unreal. So busy. If you ever see me looking bored or moaning that there's nothing to do send me home and tell me to do one of the many many things that need done.
I also started redesigning my tunasandwich site, so that needs finished off and coded. Bah. And I have countless pictures that I want to make in to stencils, as well as actually grow the balls to stencil outside. For which I would need my logo stencil done and some text. I don't want to just put up imagery I want to make people think.
Anyway. Time is pressing and I better do some more design work before hitting the pool and re-assembling the house.
I kind of want some salmon. Shame i have no money. noooo money. Grrrr. Anyone want to buy me salmon for dinner?
I created the best playlist in the world ever. Now, I know I have claimed this in the past, but those playlists (that I usually make for other people) are the best playlists in the world that they've ever heard. This playlist is the best playlist in the world that I have ever heard. I thought that the June playlist, which was inevitably the China playlist as well, was pretty amazing, but this tops the lot.
I made a smart playlist on iTunes that gathers the top listened to 111 songs. yes I am obsessed with the 11's and the 1's.
I just finished my first ever listen through the whole thing. 7.9 hours of the most amazing music and memories ever. I am well pleased. As time progresses so will the playlist. That is the beauty of it, it will always be the best playlist in the world ever. This is a fact.
I have some amazing pictures of the past couple of days to post as well. Possibly tonight after swimming, while watching still Game perhaps :)
I've also been eating peanut butter M&Ms like they're going out of fashion, and the supply is running low. GASP.
I'll tell you me though, I made an absolutely spiffing dinner last night. AMAZING. I should screenshot the playlist, I'm that much in love with it.
My 17inch Mac Daddy Pro will be with me on Saturday. Pleased.
I also have no ceilings in the bathroom and kitchen, a possibility that I'm breating in asbestos and a bedroom and living room filled with junk from the aforementioned ceiling-less rooms. BAH. My stress levels and acid levels are beyond high. I need to get a grip of my life. Hmmm. I also need to call the docooootototor for some more prescription. The magic of the NHS. NN HHH SSS.
Also, I downloaded The Lost Boys last night because I'm far too cheap and skint to buy it, but there was no sound, so I am re-downloading it again. I got an overwhelming desire to see it because I've been reading the twilight saga. I think it's because I want the ending to be how I see it, and I'm not concerned with Bella, Jacob or Edward. What I want is for for Bella's Dad – Charlie – to make some sly comment at the end about how he always knew there were vampires and werewolves. I actually want her Mum and Dad to do that. Just like how The Lost Boys ends. I love that scene, I think it might be one of my all time favourite scenes.
I looked for it on YouTube there to no avail. When my version downloads I'll chop it and post it for you to see what I mean. It's the best part of the whole movie. Perhaps the best part of the 80s.
There's some crazy competitions just now that I keep hearing about, one is a straight out art competition, there's one that encourages people to make a movie of their home town, one to make a flag that will unite the world, and a church art competition. I want to enter them all. But I am severly lacking in time. What was it that Wee John told me, 'Is time on your side?' No it's not wee john there's far too much to do. Far too much. On top of that I still have Ross's website (if he still wants me to do it), Justin's logo, Mary's work too and now Mark's sister's poetry book. I'm happy to do them all, life just gets in the way of everything. And then I want to start my record label, publicise Bleary (I <3 Bleary... you will see how much when I post my 111 playlist haha), save the world, start one of my many books that I plan on making. Who honestly has the time. On top of all that I am actually working and paying back my debts. I don't know how normal people manage it, then all I want to do is knit, bake, and sew things. I love being me and having my strange desires but I am so busy it's unreal. So busy. If you ever see me looking bored or moaning that there's nothing to do send me home and tell me to do one of the many many things that need done.
I also started redesigning my tunasandwich site, so that needs finished off and coded. Bah. And I have countless pictures that I want to make in to stencils, as well as actually grow the balls to stencil outside. For which I would need my logo stencil done and some text. I don't want to just put up imagery I want to make people think.
Anyway. Time is pressing and I better do some more design work before hitting the pool and re-assembling the house.
I kind of want some salmon. Shame i have no money. noooo money. Grrrr. Anyone want to buy me salmon for dinner?
I'm Not Ill and You're Not Dead...
.... Doesn't that make us the perfect pair?
I had something that was partially intersting to say. I can't remember what it was now.
I'll tell you though. There were workmen here the this morning because they want to take the ceiling away, but they're coming back tomorrow. However, I've had to clean and empty the bathroom and kitchen areas. This led me to come across a Teenage Mutant HERO turtles mug that was sitting on a unit burried under soda streams and tin foil (that's tin foil not aluminum foil.. PAH).
Violin lesson went okay.
I bought a mac book pro today. 17inch mac daddy pro, it should be here on Friday, which means the weekend will be spent transferring, wiping and listing on ebay :( I love Nick the 17inch Mac Daddy, but we will be getting Bates the 17inch Mac Daddy Pro. PROOOOOO.
With that little extra kick, a remote control and a web cam. Someone stop me, I'm going to make some lie budget movies.
Remind me to enter all the competitions i keep reading about.
I have so much to do, and no time. It's crazy.
BAH... that's it.
I had a really freaky dream. I dreamed I went to see the doctor and she automatically gave me some kind of fertility test. Weird?
And then she sat me down and told me in a really sad and serious voice that (of course this was while I was crashing my car, running around town, having my family randomly floating around me) she was really sorry, but my eggs were over producing and that meant that I was exceptionally fertile. At which point I got kind of excited. Then she continued to say that 'they could not be chryogenically frozen.' Then I realised I was about to embark on some kind of organ interferring adventure or operation. Then I got really sad.
I need to stop going to sleep, because everytime I wake up I just get sad again. Then after about 2 hours I'm fine.
I damn thee to hell glandular fever. Did I mention my new enlightenment? Glandular Fever can be brought on by huge emotional events. More and more things about December keep adding up. I wish I had never left.
I love people that sing in Scottish accents.
I love Scottish bands in general. I'm always surprised at the amount of amazing Scottish bands.
The Twilight Sad
Frightened Rabbit
Biffy Clyro
Idlewild
The Proclaimers
Camera Obscura
Belle and Sabastian
Garbage
and the ones I don't know so well
Franz Ferdinand
The Fratellis
Anyway, i have work to do. Or bed to go to. I don't know which is the most logical choice at this time. Hmmm.
I had something that was partially intersting to say. I can't remember what it was now.
I'll tell you though. There were workmen here the this morning because they want to take the ceiling away, but they're coming back tomorrow. However, I've had to clean and empty the bathroom and kitchen areas. This led me to come across a Teenage Mutant HERO turtles mug that was sitting on a unit burried under soda streams and tin foil (that's tin foil not aluminum foil.. PAH).
Violin lesson went okay.
I bought a mac book pro today. 17inch mac daddy pro, it should be here on Friday, which means the weekend will be spent transferring, wiping and listing on ebay :( I love Nick the 17inch Mac Daddy, but we will be getting Bates the 17inch Mac Daddy Pro. PROOOOOO.
With that little extra kick, a remote control and a web cam. Someone stop me, I'm going to make some lie budget movies.
Remind me to enter all the competitions i keep reading about.
I have so much to do, and no time. It's crazy.
BAH... that's it.
I had a really freaky dream. I dreamed I went to see the doctor and she automatically gave me some kind of fertility test. Weird?
And then she sat me down and told me in a really sad and serious voice that (of course this was while I was crashing my car, running around town, having my family randomly floating around me) she was really sorry, but my eggs were over producing and that meant that I was exceptionally fertile. At which point I got kind of excited. Then she continued to say that 'they could not be chryogenically frozen.' Then I realised I was about to embark on some kind of organ interferring adventure or operation. Then I got really sad.
I need to stop going to sleep, because everytime I wake up I just get sad again. Then after about 2 hours I'm fine.
I damn thee to hell glandular fever. Did I mention my new enlightenment? Glandular Fever can be brought on by huge emotional events. More and more things about December keep adding up. I wish I had never left.
I love people that sing in Scottish accents.
I love Scottish bands in general. I'm always surprised at the amount of amazing Scottish bands.
The Twilight Sad
Frightened Rabbit
Biffy Clyro
Idlewild
The Proclaimers
Camera Obscura
Belle and Sabastian
Garbage
and the ones I don't know so well
Franz Ferdinand
The Fratellis
Anyway, i have work to do. Or bed to go to. I don't know which is the most logical choice at this time. Hmmm.
Friday, 18 July 2008
The Death of a Bracelet and other updates, thoughts, and observations.
So, my internet is currently broken and I can’t be bothered spending hours trying to fix it, so I hope it fixes itself for the weekend.
Something tragic has happened (other than the internet not working and me having to type this in word – I have to vent somehow) I glanced at my wrist about 15 minutes ago and felt there was something not quite right, so I kept looking and realised that the green, white, black and purple bracelet is gone. GONE. What’s that about. I had it at graduation, that’s a fact. I have NEVER lost a bracelet without noticing. I ALWAYS notice, I ALWAYS find them. So I’m still holding out hope that I might be able to find it. Even if it means swimming to the bottom of that skanky pool and fishing the beads out one by one. That’s where I’m assuming I lost it, at the pool tonight.
Here are the stats. Quite pitiful if you ask me, but here we go:
1450m in 50 minutes
200m Front Crawl
100m Breast Stroke
100m Back Stroke
200m Front Crawl legs
100m Breast Stroke Legs
100m Back Crawl Legs
With Paddles
200m Front Crawl
25m Front Crawl
25m Breast Stroke
25m Front Crawl
25m Back Crawl
25m Front Crawl
25m Breast Stroke
25m Front Crawl
25m Back Crawl
25m Front Crawl
25m Breast Stroke
25m Front Crawl
25m Back Crawl
Without Paddles
25m Front Crawl
25m Breast Stroke
25m Front Crawl
25m Back Crawl
50m Swim Down.
It was Amie’s third birthday today, so I swung by the scout hall to give her birthday hugs and to scran her birthday cake – Thomas the Tank Engine. I AM SO PLEASED. It reminded me of this little plastic cup I used to have that I would drink my warm milk out of every night before bed. I loved that cup. It was one of the things that never made it out of the house on the day my mum broke in to get our stuff. That’s another story for another day though.
I must look on ebay and see if I can’t find one, like I found My Little Pony ear muffs like I used to wear.
I then came home, cooked dinner, watched some still game (which made me laugh erratically), then played some violin before embarking on the small amount of work that needed done before tomorrow, only I can’t do it because I need to convert a font from True Type to Postscript, but I can’t because I don’t know how to and only the internet can tell me. LAME.
Anyway.
I laughed so much at still game. There was this one part where Jack and Victor went to see their friend who’s wife had just died and he had been pissing in a pot under the bed because going into the bathroom reminded him of his wife too much. Jack and Victor were asked to take the pot out from under the bed because their other friend had burnt his hand and couldn’t lift it. So they both made a farce out of trying to get it, and trying to pretend the other couldn’t reach it so they wouldn’t have to do it. When it was finally taken out from under the bed – it was gross and cloudy – Victor took an empty pot and pretended to empty it onto Jack, which was funny enough. But then when Victor lifted the actual pee pot he tripped on the carpet and actually emptied it all over Jack and I could not stop laughing, out loud. It scared me a little. Because a laugh is a sign to another human being that everything is alright, there are no other humans, and I was laughing out loud on my own. I think I’m starting to go mental. Or maybe it really was that funny.
So, I’ve realised that I am doing an ‘Earl’, from My Name is Earl. However, rather than correcting all the things I have done wrong to people I am correcting all the things I should have done or shouldn’t have given up on. Hence the violin and the desire to skateboard. So the list so far, in the past few years is this:
Strong, fast swimmer (I always wanted to swim in the Olympics ALWAYS – still do)
Competent violin player, possibly able to play in a band like Andrew Bird, Jens Lekman, Caribou, Iron and Wine and, I think, Cocorosie too.
Skateboarder like Michael J. Fox in Back to the Future
Write a fiction book.
Write a non-fiction book.
An animator
Photography
Cyclist
Runner
A vampire slayer
A drummer (a guitarist, bassist and general rock star)
A graffiti artist
A punk in the seventies
A girl
A non-girl
Now I’m just being crazy and silly.
A make up artist
A model
An actress
Anyway, I’m getting silly with these. But the first ones are real.
I was looking at some girls today in the swimming pool, and I realised I cannot compete. I can’t ever compete with the girls who wear bikinis for no reason other than to be looked at. I can’t do that – ever. And one of the things I didn’t like about Salt Lake is that there were a lot of girls like that. They would be the most modestly dressed on a Sunday, but given half the chance – Hallowe’en, sitting by the pool, swimming, hot tubing, hiking, being in the sun in general, pool parties, and everything else that would involve group hanging and being outside – they would be in short skirts, bikinis, short shorts, tank tops, spaghetti strap tops etc etc, and I just can’t do that any more. That was my life for a while, but no more. And the excuse of being on holiday, or it being too hot is just rubbish, for me anyway. I used to like the attention I got, and the staring from boys when I did dress immodestly. But, I am so over it, I am so done with it, and if that means I have no sniff at competing then screw it. Screw it all. Fact.
The internet is working again, and I managed to find a video clip of the Still Game Scene.
SERIOUSLY… You have to watch it.
I think more than anything that’s what’s still upsetting my about Utah. It’s the fact that I was unnecessarily and un-wanting-ly entered into a competition that I didn’t know how to handle. It is a fact and widely known fact that citizens of the United Kingdom date differently from those in the United States, not to mention the residents of Utah. So, I was left confused when I felt like I was shoved into some kind of competition for attention. It was so odd, and the kind of thing that I will write an essay on if I ever work out the dynamics of what actually happened. I tell you this though, I might have found the reason there’s so much depression and medicated depression in the US, it’s because during the dating process no one actually knows where they stand and they end up getting anxious and try too hard.
That’s my problem, when I’m faced with competition I become too obsessed with being perfect that I forget to just be normal. It steals my confidence and I just have no idea how to behave, or what to say, because I start to care too much. Care too much about what the person thinks, and what everyone else thinks. In my natural environment I couldn’t care less what people think, but this Utah adventure I was so self-conscious, and I attribute that purely and solely to the fact that without realising it I was competing with everyone in the state. Every single female. And I didn’t like it. I don’t think my adventure with Utah is over yet. I’ve still not written an single essay about that place, but I need to. I think that’s one of my definite angles. To start talking and writing about religion as a solution to problems rather than the cause of problems. I’m not sure though. Where better to start that a state that’s technically a colony of religion. Ha.
So, here I do my make up on the train, let my hair dry by itself and never straighten it. When in Utah I have to do my make up, pluck the brows, straighten the hair and take about an hour to get ready. Here, I’m out the door in 15 minutes, sometimes less. It’s impressive sometimes. In that time I fill my Nalgene, pack my bags, feed the cat and get dressed (obviously), while grabbing breakfast and lunch.
Because this is word, still, there is no end to the writing. I’m just going to keep going. So I should really call it a night.
At lunch time today, I went to borders, picked up a copy of New Moon, and started reading it in Starbucks with a grande hot chocolate with whipped cream. More than anywhere else in Glasgow, I think Borders Starbucks is my favourite place to be; to sit.
I love it. When my lunch time had well expired I bought the book and went back to work. Now, I am not so happy that I started to read it. The last one ended so nicely, and now it’s just drama. It’s almost like watching Dawson’s creek again, Joey and Dawson, are they together or are they not.
Anyway – have I yet expressed my great happiness at the fact that Katie Holmes is NOT in the new Batman movie. How much do I want to see that movie. Maggie Gyllenhall will be so much better because 1. She’s not irritating, and 2. She can speak out of her whole mouth and not just the side, and 3. she was never in dawson’s creek.
Pah Ha.
It’s well past bedtime and I am shattered. No nap today. Here’s hoping I get a sleeping pattern back soon.
Something tragic has happened (other than the internet not working and me having to type this in word – I have to vent somehow) I glanced at my wrist about 15 minutes ago and felt there was something not quite right, so I kept looking and realised that the green, white, black and purple bracelet is gone. GONE. What’s that about. I had it at graduation, that’s a fact. I have NEVER lost a bracelet without noticing. I ALWAYS notice, I ALWAYS find them. So I’m still holding out hope that I might be able to find it. Even if it means swimming to the bottom of that skanky pool and fishing the beads out one by one. That’s where I’m assuming I lost it, at the pool tonight.
Here are the stats. Quite pitiful if you ask me, but here we go:
1450m in 50 minutes
200m Front Crawl
100m Breast Stroke
100m Back Stroke
200m Front Crawl legs
100m Breast Stroke Legs
100m Back Crawl Legs
With Paddles
200m Front Crawl
25m Front Crawl
25m Breast Stroke
25m Front Crawl
25m Back Crawl
25m Front Crawl
25m Breast Stroke
25m Front Crawl
25m Back Crawl
25m Front Crawl
25m Breast Stroke
25m Front Crawl
25m Back Crawl
Without Paddles
25m Front Crawl
25m Breast Stroke
25m Front Crawl
25m Back Crawl
50m Swim Down.
It was Amie’s third birthday today, so I swung by the scout hall to give her birthday hugs and to scran her birthday cake – Thomas the Tank Engine. I AM SO PLEASED. It reminded me of this little plastic cup I used to have that I would drink my warm milk out of every night before bed. I loved that cup. It was one of the things that never made it out of the house on the day my mum broke in to get our stuff. That’s another story for another day though.
I must look on ebay and see if I can’t find one, like I found My Little Pony ear muffs like I used to wear.
I then came home, cooked dinner, watched some still game (which made me laugh erratically), then played some violin before embarking on the small amount of work that needed done before tomorrow, only I can’t do it because I need to convert a font from True Type to Postscript, but I can’t because I don’t know how to and only the internet can tell me. LAME.
Anyway.
I laughed so much at still game. There was this one part where Jack and Victor went to see their friend who’s wife had just died and he had been pissing in a pot under the bed because going into the bathroom reminded him of his wife too much. Jack and Victor were asked to take the pot out from under the bed because their other friend had burnt his hand and couldn’t lift it. So they both made a farce out of trying to get it, and trying to pretend the other couldn’t reach it so they wouldn’t have to do it. When it was finally taken out from under the bed – it was gross and cloudy – Victor took an empty pot and pretended to empty it onto Jack, which was funny enough. But then when Victor lifted the actual pee pot he tripped on the carpet and actually emptied it all over Jack and I could not stop laughing, out loud. It scared me a little. Because a laugh is a sign to another human being that everything is alright, there are no other humans, and I was laughing out loud on my own. I think I’m starting to go mental. Or maybe it really was that funny.
So, I’ve realised that I am doing an ‘Earl’, from My Name is Earl. However, rather than correcting all the things I have done wrong to people I am correcting all the things I should have done or shouldn’t have given up on. Hence the violin and the desire to skateboard. So the list so far, in the past few years is this:
Strong, fast swimmer (I always wanted to swim in the Olympics ALWAYS – still do)
Competent violin player, possibly able to play in a band like Andrew Bird, Jens Lekman, Caribou, Iron and Wine and, I think, Cocorosie too.
Skateboarder like Michael J. Fox in Back to the Future
Write a fiction book.
Write a non-fiction book.
An animator
Photography
Cyclist
Runner
A vampire slayer
A drummer (a guitarist, bassist and general rock star)
A graffiti artist
A punk in the seventies
A girl
A non-girl
Now I’m just being crazy and silly.
A make up artist
A model
An actress
Anyway, I’m getting silly with these. But the first ones are real.
I was looking at some girls today in the swimming pool, and I realised I cannot compete. I can’t ever compete with the girls who wear bikinis for no reason other than to be looked at. I can’t do that – ever. And one of the things I didn’t like about Salt Lake is that there were a lot of girls like that. They would be the most modestly dressed on a Sunday, but given half the chance – Hallowe’en, sitting by the pool, swimming, hot tubing, hiking, being in the sun in general, pool parties, and everything else that would involve group hanging and being outside – they would be in short skirts, bikinis, short shorts, tank tops, spaghetti strap tops etc etc, and I just can’t do that any more. That was my life for a while, but no more. And the excuse of being on holiday, or it being too hot is just rubbish, for me anyway. I used to like the attention I got, and the staring from boys when I did dress immodestly. But, I am so over it, I am so done with it, and if that means I have no sniff at competing then screw it. Screw it all. Fact.
The internet is working again, and I managed to find a video clip of the Still Game Scene.
SERIOUSLY… You have to watch it.
I think more than anything that’s what’s still upsetting my about Utah. It’s the fact that I was unnecessarily and un-wanting-ly entered into a competition that I didn’t know how to handle. It is a fact and widely known fact that citizens of the United Kingdom date differently from those in the United States, not to mention the residents of Utah. So, I was left confused when I felt like I was shoved into some kind of competition for attention. It was so odd, and the kind of thing that I will write an essay on if I ever work out the dynamics of what actually happened. I tell you this though, I might have found the reason there’s so much depression and medicated depression in the US, it’s because during the dating process no one actually knows where they stand and they end up getting anxious and try too hard.
That’s my problem, when I’m faced with competition I become too obsessed with being perfect that I forget to just be normal. It steals my confidence and I just have no idea how to behave, or what to say, because I start to care too much. Care too much about what the person thinks, and what everyone else thinks. In my natural environment I couldn’t care less what people think, but this Utah adventure I was so self-conscious, and I attribute that purely and solely to the fact that without realising it I was competing with everyone in the state. Every single female. And I didn’t like it. I don’t think my adventure with Utah is over yet. I’ve still not written an single essay about that place, but I need to. I think that’s one of my definite angles. To start talking and writing about religion as a solution to problems rather than the cause of problems. I’m not sure though. Where better to start that a state that’s technically a colony of religion. Ha.
So, here I do my make up on the train, let my hair dry by itself and never straighten it. When in Utah I have to do my make up, pluck the brows, straighten the hair and take about an hour to get ready. Here, I’m out the door in 15 minutes, sometimes less. It’s impressive sometimes. In that time I fill my Nalgene, pack my bags, feed the cat and get dressed (obviously), while grabbing breakfast and lunch.
Because this is word, still, there is no end to the writing. I’m just going to keep going. So I should really call it a night.
At lunch time today, I went to borders, picked up a copy of New Moon, and started reading it in Starbucks with a grande hot chocolate with whipped cream. More than anywhere else in Glasgow, I think Borders Starbucks is my favourite place to be; to sit.
I love it. When my lunch time had well expired I bought the book and went back to work. Now, I am not so happy that I started to read it. The last one ended so nicely, and now it’s just drama. It’s almost like watching Dawson’s creek again, Joey and Dawson, are they together or are they not.
Anyway – have I yet expressed my great happiness at the fact that Katie Holmes is NOT in the new Batman movie. How much do I want to see that movie. Maggie Gyllenhall will be so much better because 1. She’s not irritating, and 2. She can speak out of her whole mouth and not just the side, and 3. she was never in dawson’s creek.
Pah Ha.
It’s well past bedtime and I am shattered. No nap today. Here’s hoping I get a sleeping pattern back soon.
Thursday, 17 July 2008
Left Over Pastry.
Okay, so I had left over pie crust from last weeks baking endevours, so I made some jam tarts today. Yes, I know what you're thinking, 'That dough is a week old.' Well, I'm cooking it, so I'm sure it's grand, and it's been in the fridge, in tin foil. That's tin foil, not aluminum foil. Pah.
I watched/listened to Ed Byrne on You Tube, his entire DVD is on there in nine parts, and there was one section that spoke about Americans and how he hated the way they said aluminum foil, aluminum cans, because everyone knows it's pronounce Tin Foil. It made me laugh a lot. A LOT. In my head though because I was in work.
So, I've had a lot of realisations this week, and I suppose I have two choices, I either ask questions to get a clarifying and confirming perspective, or I just continue down this path that might lead to self-destruction. Fact.
Anyway, let's show you what we all came here for.
Check out that plate.
I have this amamzing tea set that I got with Eilidh in Inverness once. It's china with gold sparkley designs on it. I decided to sell it on ebay. I sold it for £9, but then I outbid the bidder with my Mum's account because I decided I wanted to keep it. It is amazing, and it will look wicked in my totally kitsch future house, with my Hello Kitty Toaster - if I didn't blow it up the day I got it back from New York. I wonder if Canadian Steve ever fixed it.
Anyway, check out my jam tarts. They are not like any other tarts because they are not the traditional round shape, no no, they are heart and star shaped. Why? Because that's the only cutters I could find.
I ate a gazillion of them already. I'm eating for two now, so I'm allowed. (two being me and the cat.)
Today was another day of 'I remember every Kiss' by Jens. I love Jens. I love his little accent that peaks through while he sings. I think I might marry him. I've decided. I'm going to tell him tomorrow at 1:37pm and then he can write a song about.
I should really update my vector/avatar because i no longer have my skunk hair. I'm growing all the colour out. A person with money would die over it, someone cheap like me would let it grow out.
I am shattered and I'm going to bed now. I want some chamomile tea, however, I am far too lazy to walk downstairs and boil the kettle.
I also went for my second violin lesson today. I'm so excited the music I was given was so exciting. I can't wait to be a professional. It will be wicked.
I finished twilight today. It seems to have come to a bit of an anti-climax. The whole action section seemed to just end, and it got very same-y. It was the same thing over and over again. I mean, it was entertaining, it's the most romance i'm getting this summer haha, but i started to get irritated at how needy Bella was. The vampire needs space girl. Then I realised how obsessive I am about boys, and how I need to stop that (again), because it just ruins everything, and my only comfort is that it might not be too late. But it more than likely is.
Still no word from fabrica. Two months, exactly, today was when they received my folio. So, it's any time from now. I don't even know if I want to go any more. I feel like it's holding me back from making other decisions now. But I suppose whatever is meant to be will be and it will work out in the end.
I hope.
I faith.
I robot.
I hungry.
I need tea.
I sleepy.
I need teeth brush.
I need to read the next twilight saga book.
I need vampire love.
I need love.
I cat.
iCat
iFreak
iAddict
iScottish
iGeek
iCrazy
iObsessive
iAsleepOnFaceNow
iMeow.
ixxx
iStillFrameAnimation. I've decided, after animating some 360 degree laptop views in flash that I want to make my third still frame animation. I decided it a few weeks ago, in passing, but now I'm serious. Now I need a song, and a plot and a script, and some willing actors - or toys.
I watched/listened to Ed Byrne on You Tube, his entire DVD is on there in nine parts, and there was one section that spoke about Americans and how he hated the way they said aluminum foil, aluminum cans, because everyone knows it's pronounce Tin Foil. It made me laugh a lot. A LOT. In my head though because I was in work.
So, I've had a lot of realisations this week, and I suppose I have two choices, I either ask questions to get a clarifying and confirming perspective, or I just continue down this path that might lead to self-destruction. Fact.
Anyway, let's show you what we all came here for.
Check out that plate.
I have this amamzing tea set that I got with Eilidh in Inverness once. It's china with gold sparkley designs on it. I decided to sell it on ebay. I sold it for £9, but then I outbid the bidder with my Mum's account because I decided I wanted to keep it. It is amazing, and it will look wicked in my totally kitsch future house, with my Hello Kitty Toaster - if I didn't blow it up the day I got it back from New York. I wonder if Canadian Steve ever fixed it.
Anyway, check out my jam tarts. They are not like any other tarts because they are not the traditional round shape, no no, they are heart and star shaped. Why? Because that's the only cutters I could find.
I ate a gazillion of them already. I'm eating for two now, so I'm allowed. (two being me and the cat.)
Today was another day of 'I remember every Kiss' by Jens. I love Jens. I love his little accent that peaks through while he sings. I think I might marry him. I've decided. I'm going to tell him tomorrow at 1:37pm and then he can write a song about.
I should really update my vector/avatar because i no longer have my skunk hair. I'm growing all the colour out. A person with money would die over it, someone cheap like me would let it grow out.
I am shattered and I'm going to bed now. I want some chamomile tea, however, I am far too lazy to walk downstairs and boil the kettle.
I also went for my second violin lesson today. I'm so excited the music I was given was so exciting. I can't wait to be a professional. It will be wicked.
I finished twilight today. It seems to have come to a bit of an anti-climax. The whole action section seemed to just end, and it got very same-y. It was the same thing over and over again. I mean, it was entertaining, it's the most romance i'm getting this summer haha, but i started to get irritated at how needy Bella was. The vampire needs space girl. Then I realised how obsessive I am about boys, and how I need to stop that (again), because it just ruins everything, and my only comfort is that it might not be too late. But it more than likely is.
Still no word from fabrica. Two months, exactly, today was when they received my folio. So, it's any time from now. I don't even know if I want to go any more. I feel like it's holding me back from making other decisions now. But I suppose whatever is meant to be will be and it will work out in the end.
I hope.
I faith.
I robot.
I hungry.
I need tea.
I sleepy.
I need teeth brush.
I need to read the next twilight saga book.
I need vampire love.
I need love.
I cat.
iCat
iFreak
iAddict
iScottish
iGeek
iCrazy
iObsessive
iAsleepOnFaceNow
iMeow.
ixxx
iStillFrameAnimation. I've decided, after animating some 360 degree laptop views in flash that I want to make my third still frame animation. I decided it a few weeks ago, in passing, but now I'm serious. Now I need a song, and a plot and a script, and some willing actors - or toys.
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